In the End
by stefanie-k
Summary: AU, S7 after 'Beneath You'. Spike's not all THAT crazy, he's making sense... 'cause everyone feels it too. UNFINISHED FOREVER. ;;
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: All hail to Great One, Joss Whedon. All belong to him, all are his creations. =)  
  
Setting: My take on Season 7 of BtVS, after 'Beneath You', and how AtS fits into the new season. Connection anyone? It's sort of an A/U fic, but not really. It's just what I think may happen this season. It'll be an eventual crossover. Not quite sure how this is going to turn out, so R&R! I'll decide whether I'll continue from the reviews. =)  
  
In the End  
  
Prologue  
  
Buffy looked into her bathroom mirror. What happened to Spike? He got his soul back, but with much more dire repercussions than Angel. He got his soul because of her, no, *for* her. He wanted her to get what she deserved. But what was it that she deserved exactly? A vampire with a soul? Been there, done that, and didn't want to go there again. The soul- infused vampire that was Angel loved her, hurt her, and left her. He left her to find redemption.  
  
Redemption.  
  
That was what Angel wanted. His soul was a curse. Spike wanted a soul. He didn't want redemption. So what was he now?  
  
"What you wanted, right? It's what *you* wanted, right? And now... Everybody is in here, talking... Everything I did, everyone one I... And him. And it, the other- the thing, beneath- beneath you. It's here too." That was what he said to her. Ramblings of a crazy-person. Yet, there was a hint of meaning in his words. Sure enough, he remembered everything he did, those he hurt. Expressing himself seemed hard. His words came out in short phrases, that seemingly had no connection.  
  
It was a horrifying to see him in that state. She couldn't move, she couldn't speak. Not after... Not after he willingly embraced that cross. Willingly. It was like the things he did were too much for him. He wanted to end everything, wanted whatever was making him this way to go away, and him with it.  
  
"Can we rest now? Buffy, can we rest?" Those words played over and over in her mind like an endless recording.  
  
She thought that when Spike left, he had left for good. In reality, she hoped he would come back. She never uninvited him from her house. But she didn't expect him to come back like this.  
  
*Can we rest?* Buffy thought to herself morbidly. What did he mean? That question encompassed so much, too much.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
To be continued... Maybe.  
  
It's up to you guys. Do you think this story's got potential to go further? 


	2. Chapter 1: Welcome Back

Chapter 1: Welcome Back  
  
It was the next day. Buffy and Dawn were awake nice and early, getting ready for school. Buffy was still getting used to this... again. She was back at Sunnydale High School, the place where so much of her life took place. Well, her Slayer life, that is. Now she wasn't a student, rather, she was a part of administration, a counselor. The job description couldn't fit her better. She was to watch over the children, to be someone they could talk to. A protector, just as she was named at her high school prom.  
  
"Dawn! Let's go! Xander will be here any minute!" Buffy called up the stairs.  
  
"I'll be down! Hold your horses!" Dawn shouted back.  
  
Buffy sighed and walked into the kitchen. There were two perfect brown paper bags sitting on the counter. She made lunch for both of them. She looked over to the stove, which was off. The dishes were done and all put away. She then walked into the living room. Perfect as usual. Everything was in place, and tidy. The dining room was just the same, nothing out of place. The house seemed... eerie.  
  
No one but she and Dawn lived in the house anymore. Though there were two, it seemed nothing but lonely. Mornings were no longer busy and hectic with people buzzing around, trying to get where they needed to be. The last time there was any excitement in the house was... before the summer.  
  
The Summers residence was home to many traumatizing experiences. Tara's death was the latest to the list. It was unbelievable that so many things have happened there. Now the house seemed empty. Empty to life, that is. Death cloaked the house like a shroud. There were too many losses. Not since Tara's death had Buffy entered the master bedroom. When it came to cleaning it, she asked Xander to do it.  
  
Xander. He was the only one left. No one else was left that was reliable. Giles left with Willow after the events that happened before the summer. Anya was back to recapturing her vengeance demon years. Spike had left, to only come back with a soul... A soul that made him mad. Xander was left, and he was the one rock the Summers sisters could lean on.  
  
There was a knock on the door. Probably Xander. "Dawn!" Buffy called again, as she walked over to the door. "That's probably Xander! Let's go!"  
  
But when she opened the door, she was surprised to see who was standing there.  
  
"Hi..." Willow greeted cautiously.  
  
"Will... You... You're..." were the only words Buffy could muster.  
  
"I'm back, I know," she said.  
  
"Come in," Buffy said and opened the door further to let her friend step in.  
  
Willow walked in and left her bags out on the porch. She took a seat on the couch. Buffy followed her in, leaving the door open.  
  
"I don't know where to begin," Willow said feebly. "You don't know how unbelievably horrible I feel. I don't know if you guys will accept me anymore. I did some unforgivable things, things I can't ever reverse."  
  
Buffy stood there, arms folded, listening. It seemed as though that was all she ever did anymore.  
  
"Giles showed me so much while I was there. I didn't even want to leave. I didn't want to come back here, to where it all started. I still have so many questions. What if I can't control my magic and I become what I was again? Giles told me to trust my instincts, but I'm afraid of them," she explained. "At first, I was afraid to come back here just because of that. Now I'm afraid to be here because you guys might not accept me."  
  
Buffy sighed. She felt for her friend. No, not the same Willow anymore. She wished she could just give her best friend a hug and tell her everything would be all right, but so much had happened that it couldn't happen. Too much went on that could not be forgotten. Asking for forgiveness was something ambiguous, because her actions were unforgivable. Her friend was fighting her own personal battles, just as the rest of them were.  
  
"Willow, you are still my best friend. Nothing will change that. Proving yourself would be asking too much. We love you, that's why we wanted no harm to come to you. Going with Giles was the best thing. And now you're back, and we both know you're not the same. We will always accept you, Will, no matter what," Buffy told her. "But you've done things that have made us distrust you. We accept you, we always will. But trusting you is something different."  
  
At that moment, footsteps sounded from the stairs.  
  
"Okay, I'm ready Buff- Hey! Willow, you're back..." Dawn said absently, slowing down at the bottom of the stairs.  
  
"Hi, Dawn," Willow said.  
  
"You didn't tell us you were coming back..." Dawn continued. Then she looked over at her sister, realizing Buffy had kept that she knew Spike was back and didn't tell anyone. "Buffy?"  
  
"Dawn, she just came in. I didn't know. I thought it was Xander at the door," Buffy said.  
  
Then another familiar voice came ringing though the open door. "Ladies, are we ready to head off to school?" It was Xander.  
  
He walked into the house and saw Willow sitting on the couch. He was taken back, just a little. He hasn't seen his best friend in months, and now she was back. "Will. Hi," he said.  
  
Willow looked at her three friends standing by the doorway and stood up. "I don't think this was the right time. I'll come back later," Willow said and started out.  
  
"No," Buffy said. "Stay here. Dawn and I have to go to school. We'll be back this afternoon. We can talk then."  
  
"Are you sure? Because I could just..."  
  
"Willow, please stay," Dawn said.  
  
"Yeah Will. We need to talk," Xander said.  
  
Willow nodded. "If you guys say so. I'll stay."  
  
Dawn and Xander gave curt nods and took their leave. Buffy stood there for a brief moment and said, "Welcome back, Willow." Then she turned to the door and left, placing her bags inside before she shut the door.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Pain to stop the pain. Want to stop it. Need to stop it. Can't rest until it stops.  
  
Took him off the cross, she did. Then she just left. Didn't even say a word. Just left. Maybe he scared her off. He should have known the speech just wouldn't come out right. Nothing ever goes right. He never did anything right. Not in his life, or un-life. It was right. She would never understand.  
  
Dreams. Can't make them stop. Won't stop. They were in him, a part of him, driving him insane. It hurt. They were all there, haunting him. They were all waking dreams. Walking, and talking all around him. Torturing him. From beneath you, it devours.  
  
Can't rest until it stops.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Willow sat on the couch the whole day. Just thinking. They were so indifferent to her. They didn't think of her the as the same old Willow anymore. It was true, though. She wasn't the same old Willow. She was split between being a witch, and being a normal person. She had something inside her now, something a part of her. It wasn't a good something either. Something, anything, could possibly make her snap and become that homicidal freak that wreaked havoc on everyone and almost the world.  
  
Were they scared of her? That's what it felt like. It felt like the whole world was scared of her. She wasn't sure if she could go back living in it, especially living it in Sunnydale.  
  
Things had changed. Everything was different. There was something, something coming. She felt it. It was connected to her, connected to everything. Except it wasn't ready to reveal itself yet. It wouldn't, until everything was in place, all the right players were where they needed to be. Something was still missing. There would be no way to stop it, no way to keep it hidden. It will come.  
  
"We're back!" Buffy called as she opened the door. She noticed Willow was still sitting on the couch. "Have you been there all day?"  
  
"Yeah, not feeling quite up to roaming yet," was Willow's excuse.  
  
"I see..."  
  
Dawn was just standing in front of the stairs, holding her bookbag.  
  
"Hey, Dawn. How was school?" Willow asked, trying to make small talk.  
  
"Same. It's school," she said coolly. Then to Buffy she said, "I'm going upstairs to start my homework. I'll let you and Willow talk." She made her way up the stairs to her room.  
  
Buffy watched her sister run up the stairs until she heard a door shut. Then she reverted her attention back to Willow and took a seat on the couch next to her. "So Will, you're back," were the only words Buffy could think to say.  
  
She nodded. "I wanted to come back, but I feel like I'm not ready to be back here. It's not only because I feel like you guys won't accept me, there's something else. Giles told me that here is where I'm needed," Willow told Buffy.  
  
"Will, we've always needed you, as an ally, as someone who could hone the magical arts, and especially as a friend," Buffy said. "You will always be Willow, the first real friend I've made and kept since I've been here."  
  
Willow smiled at Buffy, a real smile. "Thank you. I know you mean it. But that's not what I was trying to explain. Giles said to me that here is where I'm needed. Something's coming, Buffy. Something big, and bad. I don't know what it is, but it's something you need to be ready for, because there's no way to stop it. I can feel it. The part of me that's... the witch. I'm connected to it. It's coming."  
  
Buffy looked at her. It was another warning, it seemed. Spike knew something was coming. Now Willow told her the same thing.  
  
Willow's expression was serious. "The Hellmouth, Buffy. From beneath you, it devours."  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
To be continued...  
  
Seems like you guys liked the prologue, so here's the first installment of the story! There will be more! =) 


	3. Chapter 2: Explanations

Chapter 2: Explanations  
  
Xander quickly made his way back to the Summers residence. Willow was back from England. What would he say to her?  
  
He stopped the car in front of the house. He looked up at it. Too many things happened there. He wondered what was going to happen this year. Hopefully they could stay away from death this year. Xander took a deep breath and made his way to the door, a little reluctant to knock, but he did. Buffy answered with a welcoming smile.  
  
"Hi Xander," she greeted, a note of concern in her voice.  
  
"Willow... she's still here?" he asked quietly.  
  
Buffy nodded. "Yeah, go ahead, talk to her. She's still feeling bad about everything. Be careful," she told him. Xander started to walk past Buffy. "She's in the kitchen," she told him as he was walking.  
  
Xander found Willow sitting at the counter in the kitchen. She was looking out the door, which was wide open. She looked lost, or maybe just contemplating. The same somber look was still on her face from this morning.  
  
"Hi Xander," she said, noting his presence in the room.  
  
"Hi Will," he replied, slowly making his way to the counter. He took a seat next to her. An awkward silence followed. Xander broke it by saying, "You know, if you keep looking out that door, the next thing that comes through is going to scare the living daylights out of you."  
  
She smirked. Same old Xander, the comic relief. "Nothing more can scare me," she told him. Then she added, "I can only scare myself."  
  
"Talk to me, Will," he said, placing his hand on her shoulder.  
  
Willow turned around slowly. "I never really got a chance to thank you for everything. You saved the world from me," she said to him. "You realized. It took guts to stand up to me, your best friend."  
  
Xander shrugged and said, "Best friends. That's it. I wasn't about to leave you alone. I'd rather be with you than anyone else. Veiny, dark, and witchy Willow. I'd do anything for you, even if you were going to bring a whole apocalyptic chaos into the world. You're still my best friend."  
  
"How can you say that? I changed, I'm not the same-"  
  
"Don't give me that crap, Will," he said, cutting her off. "We've all changed. We've all done things that we all regret. But we all eventually get over it and move on. Look at us, we all live with the consequences..."  
  
"My consequences should be much worse."  
  
"If you were alone," Xander said matter-of-factly. "But you're not. You have me, you have Buffy, you have Dawn. We're here to be your friends. We're here to help you, if you ask us, and even if you don't."  
  
Willow looked up at Xander, a flicker of life finally coming back to them. "Thank you."  
  
Buffy stood at the entrance to the kitchen, arms folded, watching. She smiled at their reconciliation. Willow had a lot to work on, especially now. The Scoobies were back together... The *real* Scoobies.  
  
Dawn came sneaking up behind her sister and whispered, "So is everything all cleared up and non-tense now?" She was so nosy.  
  
"Dawn, you're a little snoop," Buffy whispered back.  
  
"Me? You're the one standing at the door eavesdropping," she retorted, a little loudly. It made Willow and Xander finally notice the two bickering sisters at the kitchen door.  
  
"Join the party guys, Willow's back," was Xander's reply.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Anya was walking around town, contemplating everything that happened the night before. Was it really the right thing to do? Turn that poor excuse for a boyfriend back? He got hurt, so was it really worth it? Vengeance demon here, he *was* supposed to suffer. He got hurt, so everything was fine. She still had it.  
  
That was a lie. Trying to convince yourself of things that weren't true anymore. That was the worst, and it made you feel even more horrible if you knew you were. She didn't have it anymore. Being human changed her. She had a soft spot. She would always have a soft spot.  
  
Speaking of soft spots, she wondered if anyone figured out that Spike got his soul back. Why he didn't want anyone to know? She saw it, so clear. His eyes weren't bottomless pits of darkness anymore. It was true, the eyes *were* the doorway to the soul. She wondered, how did he get it? It couldn't have been a curse, not like Angel. No, the only way he could have gotten it back was by his own doing. He wanted it.  
  
Puzzling. A vampire who wanted their soul back. Why?  
  
Anya shrugged the thought off and thought about other things. More important things. *That* thing. That thing that was coming. She could feel it, she knew it was there. It was lurking, waiting for the right time to come out. Good guy, bad guy, it didn't matter who you were. It was coming and it would destroy everything it its path. It was pure evil. It was power.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
"So... New Big Bad? No big deal. Buffy can take care of it," was Xander's reply to Willow's prediction of the thing that was coming. "I mean, you're talking about the Hellmouth here. She beat it before, why couldn't she beat it again? It's just a big, ugly worm."  
  
Willow shook her head. "No, that's not the Hellmouth. The worm we saw, back in high school. It's just a tool. The Hellmouth is something bigger. Something incomprehensible, even for me. It's not good, something's brewing. Something is going to be unleashed, and we have no power to stop it. It's stronger than Buffy. It's not a God like Glory. I don't know when it's coming or what it is. It's waiting."  
  
"What's with the whole mysteriouso-vibe?" Dawn asked. "Willow comes back, and warns us about something... some *thing* that's coming to get us. And then she goes and says that we can't stop it? Willow, we love you, but you can really put a damper on things."  
  
Buffy gave her sister an admonishing look. She was about to start going commando on Dawn when Willow said, "No, she's right. I'm sorry I can't tell you any more. I want to warn you. It's not going to be good."  
  
"You told me that... 'From beneath you, it devours.' What does that mean? I know it's got to do with the Hellmouth," Buffy asked. "I've been hearing that phrase all too much lately. I've been having these dreams... Girls, they're getting murdered. I don't know who they are. People, in robes, with blades. They stab the girls." She appeared to be going into a trance- like state, remembering her dreams.  
  
"You never told me," Xander said, a look of shock in his eyes.  
  
"I didn't think... Dawn heard me screaming in my sleep. I thought it was the girls. At least, they *were* the girls, in my dream," Buffy explained. "I knew something had to be going on, for me to be having dreams like that. Then, everyone keeps saying to me, 'From beneath you, it devours' and I'm pretty much certain they're talking about what's coming now."  
  
There was an unsettling silence in the room. Everyone was looking at Buffy.  
  
"What does this all mean?" Dawn asked. She was confused.  
  
Just as well, everyone else in the room was confused too. It was a big puzzle. Buffy was having dreams and Willow could feel something coming. Spike warned Buffy too, but she didn't want to say anything about it. Buffy didn't know how to tell them that he had a soul that was making him go insane. Something was going to happen, and no one knew how to approach it.  
  
"Giles knows it too. He knows something is up," Willow said. "I think this is why he said that you guys needed me here."  
  
"So what do we do now? We have no library to consult. We have no Magic Box to look for resources. So... what do we do?" Xander asked.  
  
Puzzled looks from everyone. No one knew what to do.  
  
Buffy finally spoke up and said with a sigh, "We wait. We get more pieces to this puzzle and we put it together. Piece by piece. More clues. Maybe some of the demons know something. For now, I guess we get info."  
  
Willow looked at Buffy with a concerned look. "We have to be careful. I can feel that whatever's coming, it's big."  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
To be continued...  
  
What do you think? R&R please! I know, there's nothing spectacular yet, but it's coming, I promise! 


	4. Chapter 3: A Visit

Chapter 3: A Visit  
  
Things were unusually quiet for past week. There was no unusual demon activity, or supernatural freakiness. Buffy did her nightly patrolling and came up with nothing. There was the occasional vampire, whom she dusted without breaking a sweat, but other than that, nothing else. Nothing but the norm.  
  
Buffy was getting used to her job at school. It wasn't so hard, really. She'd talk to some kids every now and then, and give them advice. They put up with the same problems she did when she was in high school- minus the vampires and demons and such. It was the 'my boyfriend did this' or 'my girlfriend did that.' Then there was the whole, 'I hate this professor' and 'what can I do to fit in?' questions. It wasn't rocket science.  
  
Willow was getting back in the swing of things. Willow was being the old Willow again. She was back in school, doing her 'I'm a genius' thing during the day, and then coming home, doing her 'I'm a reforming witch' thing at night. She smiled more often, and even started helping Dawn compile a database of demons, just in case they needed quick reference.  
  
Dawn, she was turning into a mini-Willow, without the interest in magic. She was more interested in banging out stuff through her new laptop. Whenever Buffy returned from patrolling, she'd find her sister engrossed in the computer's screen, obviously surfing the 'net. She was doing quite well in school. There were no complaints from administration about her this year. Sometimes, Dawn would accompany her sister out on patrol. She wasn't such a bad fighter anymore. She acquired some technique. Dawn was growing up.  
  
Xander was doing his thing with the whole reconstruction of Sunnydale High. It wasn't completely finished yet, of course. He wanted to get it done as soon as possible, just so they'd have a better idea of the layout of the basement. He checked in with the girls every now and then, just to make sure if there was any info on the Hellmouth. He was busy with work, and reaping the success of it as well. Not only did he have his new car, but with it came a brand new apartment and a new wardrobe. More professional.  
  
Everything seemed to be going great for the past week. It was like a little vacation for the Slayer and her Slayerettes. But a vacation was suspicious. A break from any supernatural activity meant something bad was going to happen. It was always quiet before the storm.  
  
Tonight, Buffy swept the town for any usual activity, and came up with... nothing. Seven consecutive days, and she came up with absolutely nothing. No information, nothing. The dreams she'd been having were becoming more frequent. The girls in her dreams were getting killed in the same way. These people, with long robes were stabbing them with large daggers, the blade huge. They were getting murdered, and they all said the same thing, every time, "From beneath you, it devours."  
  
What exactly did that mean? Willow's insight made it known that it had something to do with the Hellmouthh, but that wasn't the end of it. Willow said the same phrase to her as well, the day after she heard it from Spike.  
  
Spike... Where was he? She hadn't seen him in a week either. She hadn't seen him since she found out. She took him off that cross he was hanging over and placed him in one of the pews. Then she walked out, utterly confused and terrified. Not terrified of him, but terrified of what he'd turned into. Terrified *for* him, and what he must be going through. She wondered what he had been doing this past week. Not even an appearance.  
  
Mostly because she was curious, and partially because she was worried, Buffy decided to go look for him. He was probably still in the school basement, his refuge. So she went there.  
  
Breaking into the school was no problem. Finding her way around the basement was another story. There were too many twists and turns. It was like a labyrinth, like each passageway would move every time she would enter another. How Spike found his way around her in his present mindset, was completely a mystery to her.  
  
Finally, after many minutes of walking around aimlessly, she heard shuffling. Instantly, her Slayer senses put her on guard. She slowly made her way toward the noise. Instinctively, she said, "Spike?"  
  
"And she comes to pay him a visit..." she heard him say softly. "You left... You didn't even say goodbye."  
  
Buffy looked around for him in the darkness. "Where are you Spike?"  
  
"You don't need to see me. I don't deserve to be seen," he said from wherever he was.  
  
"Spike, please, show yourself," Buffy pleaded softly, still walking around in the dark.  
  
"I can see you, Slayer, but you can't see me..." he sang in a childish tone. Then inquisitively he continued with, "A light, shining in the darkness... Can't shine that light on me. I'm nothing. A waste of existence."  
  
A puzzled Buffy kept searching the dark. Then she came across a crate, where shuffling could be heard from behind it. She quietly walked around it, and there he was, just sitting there, hugging his legs, looking like a frightened child. Why was he acting like this?  
  
"Spike..." she said, concern the most predominant emotion in her voice.  
  
He slowly lifted his head and looked at her. He looked like a total wreck. Buffy wished she could just smooth away the hair draping over his eyes. He was a pitiful sight, really. Anyone would think so.  
  
"Why? Why did you leave me? All alone... Just as it has always been. He deserves to be alone. Die alone..." he rambled.  
  
"What happened? How did you...? Why did you...?" Buffy asked, realizing that he already answered those questions to the best of this ability last time. "You know I..."  
  
He was looking at her, a lost look in his blue eyes. "Don't say it. I know... It knows. 'And she shall look upon him with forgiveness, and everyone will forgive and love...'" he quoted himself from their last meeting. "It wants to kill you, you know. He wants your power... That thing... Won't let me sleep... The pain..."  
  
"What pain?" she asked. The cautiously added, "Is it your soul?"  
  
He chuckled, she was so innocent about this. "Soul, soul, soul," he recited. "Tells me that I'm evil... No, tells me that *it* is evil... That we're all evil. It's there, it has always been. They never see it, and it always wins... Riddle, riddle. Who knows the answer to the riddle?"  
  
Buffy didn't know what to say. He was confusing her. He couldn't give her a straight answer to any of her questions. Every answer seemed like a riddle. She tried again to get something more out of him. "I keep hearing, 'From beneath you, it devours.' What does that mean? You said something was beneath me... What were you talking about?"  
  
He looked at her, and tilted his head to the side. Had she forgotten? "So long ago, Buffy... So long... Am I-?" He seemed to choke on his words. He shook his head, looking away from her, then turning around. "I am. He is. Always fighting. Who will win? Never meant to... Just wanted... NO!" That was when he grabbed his head and screamed.  
  
Buffy jumped back, his sudden cry scaring her. "I think... You need to be alone."  
  
He stood up then, and turned around to face her. His face was streaked with tears. "Leaving me again... Always the same..." he said. Then reverting to that frightened childlike state, she stepped back, holding his head, and said, "I can't... Pain, too much. I have to go." Then he ran away.  
  
She watched in bewilderment as the troubled vampire ran away into the darkness.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
To be continued...  
  
I hope you liked! I feel for the troubled-insane-crazy Spike this season. He can be really funny, though. I loved that line, "I'm insane. What's his excuse?" *haha* Don't forget to R&R! =) 


	5. Chapter 4: Long, Lost Friends?

Correction: I'm reposting this chapter due to a review I received. I'm not really up on the whole AtS thing, so I'm writing what I do know of it. I don't follow it religiously (like I do Buffy *haha*), so I didn't see that episode, "Birthday." Thanks for the correcting me Tigerwolf! =)  
  
So you guys don't get confused, here's a little explanation of this chapter. Of course, AtS had it's season premiere last Sunday. Cordelia's gone, Connor's been thrown out of Angel's place, and Angel's recovering. For the means of this story, I've fast-forwarded AtS so that Cordy's been found, Connor's been forgiven, and Angel is all better. But (big BUT) Cordy and Angel haven't discussed "feelings" yet. =) Happy reading.  
  
Chapter 4: Long, Lost... Friends?  
  
Willow sat in her room, meditating. She was trying to figure out what this new evil was. Through the earth she went, through roots and hidden tunnels that the "ordinary" person could not see. There was nothing, nothing at all. Only the Hellmouth, a deep blaze of fire that she did not dare enter. She could only see that it was getting bigger every moment, which meant that it would be surfacing soon.  
  
"Willow?" Dawn said, bursting into her room. Noticing that Willow was in a state of meditation, she said, "Oh! Sorry! I'll come back later!" She backed out of the doorway and began to shut the door.  
  
Willow opened her eyes and calmly said, "No, come in Dawn. I was just trying to see if I could get any clues to what this thing is."  
  
Dawn slowly walked into the room. "No luck?" she asked, a touch of hope in her voice.  
  
Willow shook her head and said sadly, "None. But I'll keep trying." Her gaze shifted to the window. "I kinda do wish Giles was here to help out."  
  
"You and the rest of us," Dawn added. "I kind of wish the gang was all together too. I bet you we'd get more done."  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Noon in LA. Angel sat in his office at the Hyperion. Since he's been back, there have been no calls for help. None whatsoever. It was weird, this was LA- there's always something going on.  
  
"Coffee?" Cordelia offered as she entered his office.  
  
He shook his head.  
  
"What's bothering you?" she asked, sitting down at the edge of his desk. She was concerned. Angel was more broody than usual these days. "I can tell something's up."  
  
He sighed. "That's just it, Cordy. Nothing's up. LA has been quiet. There haven't been any calls. Not since I've been back," he said. The a thought came to his mind and he asked, "Have you had any visions lately?"  
  
She thought for a moment. No, she hasn't had any since they've found her. "No. I just thought the Powers were giving me a vacation since I've been stuck in Limbo for three months," she told him.  
  
"That's exactly what I'm saying. Nothing's been happening, so that means something is getting ready to happen," he said, then catching himself. "Wait, did that make any sense?"  
  
"I know exactly what you're saying. It's not normal for there to be no abnormal things going on. And now that I think about it, it's kind of weird to *not* be having any visions," Cordy told him. A thought popped into her head just then. "Hey, do you think they baddies are actually scared because now there's you and Connor?"  
  
Angel looked at Cordelia with a "you've got to be kidding" look.  
  
"Hey, it's just a thought. I mean think about it-" Cordelia fell silent, and looked like she was staring into nothingness.  
  
Angel stood up from his seat. She was having a vision, and not to be selfish, he was actually relieved.  
  
It only lasted for a couple of seconds. When she snapped out of her trance- like state, her eyes were wide with surprise... and confusion?  
  
"What is it Cordy?" Angel asked, now apparently concerned.  
  
"I... Wow..." was her answer. "Something's *gotta* be wrong if I saw that."  
  
"What did you see?"  
  
She sat up and looked at Angel. "I saw Sunnydale. I saw Willow, Buffy, and Xander. Then I saw Spike. I don't know what *he's* doing there. Then there was this girl, always with Buffy and Willow and Xander. I don't know who she is. There was Anya too. She's not human either, she's... a demon," she explained. "Something's wrong. It's weird. I felt it amongst everyone. They had this whole vibe thing going."  
  
Angel was confused. Sunnydale? He hasn't been there since... He hasn't seen Buffy since...  
  
"I know that look, Angel. You're getting that 'Oh my god, Buffy's in trouble,' look. But let me tell you, that whole vibe I was feeling from everyone? They're *all* in trouble," she said.  
  
"What is *Spike* doing there?" Angel asked, confused.  
  
Cordelia shrugged. "Beats the hell out of me." Then she asked, "So what are we gonna do?"  
  
Angel really didn't want to go back to Sunnydale. There were too many memories. Too many things happened there that he didn't want to remember. But something was going to happen. Cordelia wouldn't have had a vision about it if it wasn't important.  
  
He got up and started walking to the door. "Round everyone up. We're going back to Sunnydale."  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Saturday. So boring. It was raining.  
  
Buffy sat in her bed, just looking out of the window. She didn't know what to think of Spike anymore. He turned into such a pitiful sight. A couple days had already passed since she went to see him in the basement, and she couldn't stop thinking about his state. She wondered if Angel was like this when he got his soul back for the first time.  
  
How long could she keep Spike's soul a secret from the rest of them? Should she even keep it a secret? It was obvious to everyone that Spike was definitely on the loopy side. Well, except for Willow. She hasn't seen Spike yet, but she heard the stories from Xander and Dawn.  
  
She rolled herself out of bed and decided to take a shower.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
"I can't help it. It feels so exciting to be going somewhere else," Fred announced on the car ride to Sunnydale.  
  
"Father, what is this place... Sunnydale?" Connor asked, inquisitive as ever.  
  
"It's Cordelia's hometown," Angel said, looking over at Cordelia, obviously telling her to do the explaining.  
  
She got the drift and said, "Well, Connor, it's like this. It's where I grew up. It also happens to be where the Hellmouth is. You think weird things happen in LA? It's nothing compared to what goes on in Sunnydale."  
  
Gunn was less than happy at that remark. "Great, more evil demon dudes?"  
  
Silence from both Cordelia and Angel.  
  
"And I take that as a 'yes'," Gunn said.  
  
"So... Who are the rest of the people you saw in your vision, Cordy?" Fred asked, changing the topic, noticing that there was just a bit of tension.  
  
"Friends... Well, they used to be. I haven't seen them since... Graduation. Actually, you've met Willow. She's the one who..."  
  
"Brought the news about Buffy's death," Angel finished solemnly.  
  
Fred remembered the redhead who sat in the lobby of the Hyperion. She was holding a tissue in her hand, and had a solemn look on her face. Her eyes were full of tears. Angel and Cordelia knew who she was right away, and they knew something had to have happened to Buffy.  
  
"The Slayer, right father?" Connor said.  
  
"Yes, the Slayer," Angel answered his son. His memories drifted to Buffy, whom he saw just days after her return from the dead. That meeting was... interesting. She was so distant, so unwilling to share anything with him.  
  
"You never told us what happened when you went to see her," Gunn stated.  
  
"Hey- yeah!" Cordelia exclaimed, playfully slapping his arm.  
  
"I told you guys. I don't want to talk about it," Angel said quickly. These guys were sure nosy.  
  
Cordelia gave him a look and said, "We're going to see her, and it's eventually going to come out. Why don't you just tell us now?"  
  
"No. End of discussion. Hey look, the exit's coming up," he said as he saw the sign saying, "Sunnydale: 4 miles."  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
"Ewww! That's so disgusting! Tell me why I agreed to let Xander rent this video?" Dawn squealed as she covered her eyes from the television set.  
  
Saturday night. Buffy, Dawn, Willow, and Xander were in the Summers' home having a movie night. Xander's movie pick was the cult classic, "Silence of the Lambs." They were nearing the end of the movie where Hannibal peels the cop's face off and wears it as a mask.  
  
"Dawn, you've seen more disgusting things than that. This should be a breeze to watch," Xander said.  
  
Willow's face wasn't too happy as she watched the movie either. "This isn't the movie I need to be watching," was her comment.  
  
"And this pizza doesn't look so appetizing anymore," Buffy said, eyeing the slice on the plate sitting on her lap.  
  
"See what I mean?" Dawn said. "We should've rented my first choice."  
  
"'The Wedding Planner' isn't exactly the movie I feel like watching," Xander retorted.  
  
"It would be more enjoyable right now to be watching Spike ramble on about crazy things..." Buffy mumbled incoherently.  
  
"Huh?" the other three asked in unison.  
  
A knock on the door interrupted their discussion.  
  
"I got it," Buffy said, standing up. She didn't want to have to repeat her last comment. She walked over to the door and turned the knob.  
  
Who she saw standing there was the last person she expected to see... ever again.  
  
"Angel," she said, her voice full of disbelief.  
  
The three in the living room heard her, and shot their glances towards the door.  
  
Then Buffy's expression hardened and she asked, her eyes squinted a little, "What are you doing here?"  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
To be continued...  
  
Not much of an interesting chapter, I know. I needed a chapter to incorporate the AtS characters in the mix, and this was the only way I could think of. But I do think that the chapter was a bit humorous. Who knows, maybe we'll find out what exactly happened between Buffy and Angel when the met up last season. Keep reading, since now everybody (well just about everybody...) is here, things will definitely get interesting. So R&R! =) 


	6. Chapter 5: Catching Up

Chapter 5: Catching Up  
  
Spike continued to pace around the basement. Trouble. Things were beginning to fall into place. The players were beginning to surface themselves. This meant all sorts of trouble. They shouldn't have come. They have no idea. The more power... the more destruction. Buffy was well aware of that, so was Red.  
  
He saw the Hellmouth growing. It was moving. It wouldn't surface itself until it was ready. Still a baby, it was, spurting bits of evil here and there. It was obvious what they were. It had stopped for a while, and left the town silent. Silence. It's what drove people insane. It's what made people make assumptions. It brought worry, and most of all fear.  
  
"I'm not evil, I'm not evil, I'm not evil..." Spike repeated to himself over and over. The voices were menacing. They kept telling him how evil he was, how much pain he brought to everyone. He hurt everyone who crossed his path. They told him he was worthless, trying to help the Slayer and her friends, he was what he was. He was nothing but a monster.  
  
"Did you really think a soul would help you?" they always said, and they laughed condescendingly. They told him she could never feel for a thing like him. That was what he was, a thing. Look at what receiving his soul did to him. It made him crazy.  
  
Why all the voices? Why were so many people talking to him? It needed to stop. It *had* to stop.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
"What are you doing here?" Buffy asked, staring at the vampire standing at her door.  
  
"We need to talk," he said, and tried to step into her house. He was blocked by an invisible barrier. He looked at Buffy, surprised and shocked. Had she really uninvited him?  
  
"How do we know he's not evil?" Xander chimed from the living room.  
  
Buffy gave him a questioning look. "Are you?" she asked.  
  
"I can't believe... Why would you think that?" He was shocked at her sudden coldness.  
  
She looked past him and saw his car. There were four other people sitting inside. "He's not evil. I can see Cordelia in his car," Buffy said. Then she looked at Angel and said, "Come in."  
  
He let out a sigh of relief and walked in.  
  
"Uh, Angel, are you planning on letting your friends out of your stuffy car and into my house?" Buffy said, eyeing the car in front of her house.  
  
He looked at her and realization flashed through his face. He momentarily forgot about the rest of his troop. "Oh..." He gestured to the car and four people came out and started walking to the front door.  
  
Buffy knew Cordelia, of course. She came running up to her, with a smile on her face. "Buffy! Hey!" she called. "I haven't seen you in such a long time!"  
  
Buffy was a little surprised. Was this Cordelia? It's not like they were the best of friends... Well, the never were really friends at all. If anything, they were always competing for everything. Cordelia gave Buffy a hug when she got to the porch.  
  
"Come in... everybody," Buffy said, letting each person file in, then closing the door behind her. "So what do I owe this surprise visit from the LA crew to?" she asked, walking back into the living room.  
  
Willow, Dawn, and Xander were still sitting on the couch. Angel, Cordelia, and the other three people were standing in the center of Buffy's living room.  
  
"Cordy had a vision," Angel explained. "She saw you guys in her vision, and said that you guys were in some kind of trouble."  
  
"Cordelia? Visions? Where have I been?" Xander asked, already confused.  
  
"And who's planning on introducing us?" Dawn added, loving the fact there were new people in the house, who apparently were mystically-inclined.  
  
"Oh. That's Angel, I'm Cordelia, that's Gunn, Fred, and Connor," Cordelia said, pointing to each person as she said their name. Then she looked at Dawn and asked, "Who are you?"  
  
Willow, Xander, and Buffy looked at each other. They didn't know.  
  
Innocently, Dawn answered with, "I'm Buffy's sister, Dawn."  
  
Angel and Cordelia looked at each other, confused. Buffy had a sister?  
  
"They don't know..." Dawn breathed. "Oh... I remember you guys."  
  
Buffy sat down next to her sister. "She's... my sister. It's a long story we don't feel like discussing. It involved too much... For everyone," Buffy explained. She put her hand on her sister's back.  
  
Silence. They didn't want to ask, and they knew Buffy wouldn't say anything.  
  
"So back to the question at hand. Why are you guys here?" Buffy asked.  
  
"I had a vision," Cordelia said.  
  
"She's a demon," Willow said, looking at her. "No, wait, she's only half. She has visions of people who are in trouble or are in need of help. She had a vision about us. Sunnydale. That's why they're here." She then looked at the other people and asked, "Am I right?"  
  
"How did you know that?" Angel asked, eyeing Willow.  
  
"I'm a witch," Willow answered. "Did a lot since we last saw each other, Angel." She took her eyes away from Angel's gaze.  
  
"What kind of trouble did you see exactly?" Xander asked. Then he added, "And what's going on here? Cordy's a demon, Willow's a full-fledged witch, Buffy's about as immortal as a human person can be, and what am I? I'm still just Xander."  
  
"You're Xander who saved the world before the summer," Dawn said, a cheerful smile on her face.  
  
More confused looks from the LA crowd.  
  
"Let's not get into that. Not now," Buffy said to Dawn. Then to the rest of them, "Continue. What kind of trouble?"  
  
"I don't know. My visions don't tell me exact things. The one I had about you guys just involved faces. I saw all four of you, and Spike, and Anya," Cordelia explained. "I don't know where Spike came from. Maybe he's the one causing trouble."  
  
Guilty looks from the Sunnydale crew.  
  
"He's caused enough trouble in our neck of the woods," Xander mumbled. "Besides, he's too loony to *be* trouble."  
  
"And Buffy would kick his butt to the next world and back," Dawn said coldly.  
  
"Granted, he could be great help..." Xander started.  
  
Angel raised his eyebrow. "Spike's here?" He looked over to Buffy for an explanation.  
  
"Yes, he is. He's been here for the last three years. He's useful," Buffy told Angel. "And before you get all wiggy, he's got a chip in his head, please don't ask, that makes him unable to harm humans."  
  
"What is going on in this town?" Cordelia exclaimed. She sounded frustrated, and she didn't even know the entire story.  
  
"Can't you feel it? Cordy, you're a demon. Angel, you're a vampire. You should be able to. Something's coming. The Hellmouth wants to reopen," Willow said to them. "Not like the first time. It's much more serious this time. I feel it, it's growing. It wants power."  
  
"Father, the witch makes sense. I feel the presence of something evil. It's strong, and it's getting stronger," Connor said to Angel.  
  
Xander looked at Angel, then to the boy, who looked about Dawn's age. They sure did look similar, and they both had that reserved kind of manner. "Father?" he asked, looking at Angel in disbelief.  
  
Angel took a deep breath and said, "This is my son, Connor."  
  
Buffy's eyes grew wide. Angel had a son? How? With who?  
  
"I will explain this later," Angel told them. "Back to this... thing. My son is right. It's strong. I don't think Buffy can even take on it alone."  
  
"We already know this," Willow said, jumping back into the discussion. "Right now, we're trying to get clues to what this thing may be. I've already tried looking for it, but with no luck. I can't see into the Hellmouth. It's too dangerous."  
  
"Things have been weird around here too," Buffy said. "It's been too quiet around town for the past week or so. There hasn't been anything too catastrophic. I've been patrolling every night except for tonight, and I've only encountered the regulars- vampires."  
  
"It's the same in LA," the girl named Fred said, finally joining in. "Nothing has been happening, and Cordy hasn't had vision until today, when it was about you guys."  
  
"So does this mean another possible apocalypse?" Dawn asked, trying to ease the tension in the room.  
  
Everyone shot each other glances around the room.  
  
"Looks like it," Buffy mumbled, then sighed. Then changing the subject she said, getting up, "Well, you guys are welcome to spend the night here. This house has been so empty since..." Her voice faltered a bit, remembering the events preceding the summer. She continued with, "It's just me, Dawn, and Will."  
  
The five guests nodded.  
  
"I'll go clean up my room, since obviously someone's sleeping in there with me," Dawn said, getting up too.  
  
"I guess I'm getting ready for bed," Willow announced and started heading upstairs.  
  
"This is my cue to book it back to my apartment," Xander said, heading for the door. Then he turned to the crowd and said, "You know, if there's not enough room here, there's plenty at my place." He took a look at Angel and said, "Wait, let me rephrase that. Anyone who's not Deadboy can come stay with me."  
  
Angel shot Xander a disgusted glance. Gunn and Fred ended up following Xander out the door.  
  
Cordelia headed upstairs with Dawn and Willow, while Angel and Connor stayed in the living room.  
  
Buffy stood in the living room for a moment, and then said, "I'll get you guys blankets." She turned to walk away.  
  
Angel stopped her. "Buffy. I need to talk to you. Alone."  
  
She turned around slowly. "I don't feel like talking right now," she said absently, waving her hand around, almost like shooing him away.  
  
"It's not about this... situation. It's about..."  
  
Buffy's face twisted into almost a scowl. "Not wanting to talk about that. Not right now. But on the subject of 'talking,' there *is* something I need to talk to you about, but that will have to wait until... A better opportunity," she told him.  
  
It was almost a relief that Angel was here. He was the one who could possibly tell her what was wrong with Spike. She wanted to ask him what it was like when he first got his soul back. Then again, she didn't want to actually *tell* him that Spike got his soul back. Not yet at least. It would raise just too many questions.  
  
"It was nice meeting you, Connor," Buffy said, and then retreated upstairs. What a night, what a night.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
To be continued...  
  
There are so many possible directions this story can go. Wondering where I'll go next? ;) Guess you'll just have to keep reading. =) Don't forget to R&R! 


	7. Chapter 6: Insomnia

Chapter 6: Insomnia  
  
Buffy tossed and turned in bed, much to the dismay of Dawn, who was sleeping beside her. They slept in the master bedroom, while Willow temporarily took Dawn's bedroom since Cordelia took Buffy's old bedroom for the night.  
  
"Buffy, stop moving. I can't sleep," Dawn whined. "If you can't sleep, go do something. You're ruining my beauty rest."  
  
Buffy let out a long breath. She couldn't sleep. There were too many thoughts running through her mind. First, there was the whole 'From beneath you, it devours' thing that they were all trying to figure out. Then there were the dreams that have been coming every night for the past week. Every day she would wake up screaming to sweating puddles. Then Angel and his little LA crew come out of nowhere, and now the Scoobies were faced with a whole lot of explaining to do about the past three years. And then there was Spike, how worried she really was about him. Right now, she could really give Spike a run for his money with all the things going on in her mind.  
  
She got out of bed, threw on her robe, and decided to hang out in the kitchen and have some hot tea.  
  
Buffy crept slowly down the stairs, trying to be as quiet as she could, so she wouldn't wake up Angel or Connor. When she finally made it into the kitchen, she took out her mug and started to boil some water for her tea. She looked out the window, trying to just relax and not think about anything.  
  
"Buffy?" she heard Angel say softly from the entrance to the kitchen.  
  
"Forgot. Creature of the night. You don't sleep at this time," Buffy said. Then she turned to him and said, "So what did you want to talk about before?"  
  
He took a seat at the counter. "About you," he said simply.  
  
"Me? You know about me. I'm more interested about you," she retorted, leaning next to the sink and folding her arms. "You have a son, and you didn't tell me? When did this happen? Who's the mother?"  
  
Angel took a deep breath, then replied, "Darla. She tried to make me evil again."  
  
"Oh don't *tell* me you slept with her," Buffy said, shaking her head.  
  
Angel stayed silent and rubbed the back of his head. "It's a little more complicated than that..."  
  
"It's not brain science," she said sarcastically. "But I thought vampires..." Then Buffy remembered, didn't Darla get dusted? By Angel, nonetheless? "Wait a minute. Darla's dust."  
  
Angel sighed. This was a long story. "I'm going to give you the condensed version. She was somehow brought back, human, by Wolfram and Heart. Then Drusilla came back and vamped her again. She tried to make me evil again. Yes, we slept with each other." He looked guilty for a moment. Then he continued with, "It turned out that it didn't work. Something happened, and she got pregnant."  
  
Buffy snorted and said sarcastically, "That's what condoms are for."  
  
Angel just looked at her, unflinching. It wasn't funny. He just continued with, "She came to me, after trying to find out why she was pregnant. We encountered danger, and she ended up killing herself for the child to be born. That's how Connor came into the world."  
  
"So why does he look like he's Dawn's age?" Buffy asked, genuinely wondering.  
  
"He was kidnapped by an enemy and raised in another dimension," Angel explained softly, not really wanting to recall that episode of his life.  
  
"Oh... Touchy subject, forget I asked," Buffy said. The water in the pot was boiling. She walked over to it and continued to talk. "I know you're wondering about what's been going on in the life of me."  
  
Of course he did. He always was. "What's it been like since you've been... back?"  
  
Buffy chuckled. He didn't know the beginning of it. She continued to make herself her tea as she spoke. "A lot. Well, you saw me the first few days I was back. You know how I felt. You knew how unhappy I was. I told you where I was. You comforted me, and I don't think you know how much just seeing you meant to me. At that point in time, you and..." She faltered for a moment, backing up on what she was about to say. "You were the only one who knew." She poured the hot water into her mug and took a seat across from Angel.  
  
"Are you all right now?" he asked.  
  
"I'm better," Buffy replied, shrugging. "Last year was a dark time for all of us. My sister is a reforming klepto. Giles went back to England. Xander left Anya at the altar. Warren shot Tara and I... and Tara didn't make it. Willow went on a magic rampage after that and tried to end the world. Xander saved it. That's about my time back in a nutshell." Obviously, she left out the part about sleeping with Spike. She took a sip of tea.  
  
Angel let out a tiny laugh and said, "We've been through hell and back, haven't we?"  
  
Buffy couldn't help but smile. She rolled her eyes. "You don't know the beginning of it." After another sip of tea, she continued her explanation. "Will was addicted to magic last year, and Tara ended up leaving her. Then when they finally got back together, Warren went psycho and shot me and shot Tara. Willow lost it and went evil. She just got back from England, where Giles was helping her cope with what she did, and hone her magic."  
  
"I see."  
  
"The part about Xander and Anya? They were the perfect couple. They were happy and all excited about their wedding. The day of the wedding, Xander went all missing. When he came back, he told Anya he couldn't marry her. After that whole episode, Anya went the Vengeance Demon route again," she told him, recalling the events.  
  
"What about you?" he asked, noticing how she was telling him about everyone else but her.  
  
She looked away. She couldn't tell him. He'd go psycho and kill Spike. That was the last thing she'd want Angel to worry about. She shrugged and said, "I've been sulking. Giles left because he felt he had to. I got a job at the Doublemeat Palace to make ends meet here. Riley came back last year, because he was tracking some demon. We found out he got himself married." Buffy looked over at Angel who made a face at the mention of "Riley".  
  
"So Captain America got married," Angel said, trying to hold back laughter. "I never liked that guy."  
  
Buffy smirked. "He was a good guy. I was just incredibly stupid," she scolded herself. "But that doesn't matter anymore. I'm pretty much certain that a love life for me isn't written in my Prophecy." She laughed.  
  
Which made Angel laugh in return. "Non-existent in my life too," he said, thinking about Cordelia in a flash. Once the laughter died down a little, Angel asked, "Any more interesting facts I need to know about you guys?"  
  
"I'm a counselor at Sunnydale High," Buffy beamed happily.  
  
Angel was surprised. Sunnydale High School was rebuilt?  
  
"Xander's the school's contractor," Buffy explained, taking another sip of tea. "I went on Dawn's first day to explore and met up with some vengeful zombies in the basement. But I also met up with the new principal and he offered me the job."  
  
"Don't you think that's a little..."  
  
"Weird? Yeah, I know," she said to Angel, finishing his thought. "Other than that, I think I've caught you up on everything going on in this town."  
  
"Dawn..." he said.  
  
Buffy looked down. She was obviously hurt by this topic. "She's... my sister. She wasn't always. I have the memories of her being born and everything. She knows my life, and I know hers. Willow, Xander, Anya, Spike... They all have memories of her," she explained timidly. "The monks made her out of me. I had... *have* to protect her. She was the Key, in human form." Then somberly she added, "I died for her."  
  
"Oh..." Angel could see she was hurt talking about this. He changed the topic by asking, "Spike... You mentioned him. How long has he been here?"  
  
"Don't go all wiggy on me. He's been an ally since..." She was momentarily at a loss for words. Then finally finding the right ones, she said, "He got neutered. By Riley and the commandos, if that makes you like him a little better." She chuckled at her little joke. She decided to just leave it at that.  
  
Angel was skeptical about Buffy's explanation. She was definitely not telling him something. But then again, so much has happened in his absence that he didn't really want to pry and upset her. "I haven't seen him since... Since he came looking for that damned Ring of Amarra."  
  
There was a smirk on Buffy's face. "What did you do with the ring anyway?"  
  
"Smashed it," he said simply. "It's not redemption, Buffy."  
  
Buffy quickly changed the topic. "What was it like for you, when you got your soul back?"  
  
"Why?"  
  
*Excuse, think of a good one,* Buffy told herself. "You never told me."  
  
Angel took a deep breath. "Painful at first. I remembered everything all at once, all the evil things I did." He swallowed, hard. "I cried, it was too much. I tried to be a vampire, and I found that I couldn't. I couldn't kill. I wanted redemption. Whistler helped me, showed me who you were. It was then that I decided to be one of the 'good guys'."  
  
"Did you hear voices in your head?" she asked innocently.  
  
He thought for a second then gave her a dumbfounded look. "It's a soul, Buffy. I didn't turn schitzo," he told her.  
  
*Okay, then there has to be something definitely wrong with Spike,* Buffy thought.  
  
"Why are you asking me this?" Angel asked, getting suspicious.  
  
She shrugged. "No particular reason. I just wanted to know." She took a last sip of her tea, got up, and placed the mug in the sink.  
  
"You're... different. Somehow, you're not the Buffy I remember," Angel observed as Buffy's back was turned to him.  
  
Buffy didn't take that comment to offense. She smiled as she ran some water into the sink, her back still turned to Angel. She simply said to him, "The world's not all ho-hums. I grew up. We all grew up."  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
To be continued...  
  
Awww... Buffy and Angel! (*pshaw*) Sorry, I'm a complete Buffy and Spike shipper. *But* (big *BUT*) it would be a nice thing to see some B/A action again. (I know the rest of you B/S shippers are about to shun me. Sorry!) Those two need to resolve some really big issues. Then again so do Buffy and Spike, but Angel just uppin' left Sunnydale. How unbelievably rude!  
  
Don't get discouraged, B/S fans, keep reading, you're in for a few surprises. ;)  
  
As for all the B/A fans out there, keep reading, Buffy and Angel definitely have a destiny with each other. ;)  
  
R&R! =) 


	8. Chapter 7: Demon Issues and Destiny

Chapter 7: Demon Issues and Destiny  
  
A few days had passed since the Angel Investigations team had arrived in Sunnydale. Not much happened since then. Basically, Buffy, Dawn, Willow, and Xander went on with their daily activities, while Angel, Cordelia, Gunn, and Fred sat around doing research. It was a major relief to have them around, since the resident Sunnydale-ers were busy with... life.  
  
Buffy hadn't gone patrolling since they arrived. She spent most of her time playing the amicable hostess. She cleaned the house, cooked meals, and such, but the dreams were still coming through loud and clear to her every night. Each girl was being killed in the same manner. They were chased then stabbed. It was a troubling sight, and she always woke up in a cold sweat. Every night she'd wake up and go downstairs to the kitchen, where she'd discuss things with Angel. No one really caught on, of course, but it wasn't like it was a secret either.  
  
Tonight Buffy decided to start patrolling again. Besides, it was about time to get out of the house of a thousand people. There was also the chance that she might actually bump into some information. And then there was Spike... she needed to check up on him.  
  
"I'm going patrolling," she announced to the crowd gathered at her house that night. "I'm going to see if there's anything going on or if I can get some info."  
  
"I'll go with you," Angel immediately said.  
  
"No, it's fine," Buffy said quickly, grabbing her jacket. She was already headed toward the door.  
  
Angel followed her outside. "Buffy, I'm coming with you," he told her outside on the porch. "Don't even try and argue with me."  
  
She let out an exasperated sigh and let him tag along. *So much for visiting Spike tonight,* she thought.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
"Some things don't change," Xander commented after Buffy and Angel shut the door.  
  
"Was Angel making puppy-eyes at Buffy? I think Angel was making puppy- eyes," Dawn said, a smile playing on her lips.  
  
Cordelia was less than amused at Dawn's comment. Back in Sunnydale, and back with Buffy. It's like she was the most important thing in the world in this town. Of course, she was the Slayer and all, but she was definitely not the center of the universe.  
  
Xander wasn't at all happy at Dawn's comment either. Not another vampire going all soft with Buffy. What was it with the undead and the Slayer? Were those the only men that that girl could attract? He shook his head, remembering that the love of his life was a Vengeance Demon.  
  
"Buffy's a nice girl," Fred said. It was completely obvious that she was innocent to the drama that was Buffy and Angel.  
  
"So where were we with the research?" Cordelia asked, trying to change the subject.  
  
Dawn was sitting at her laptop, pulling up passages with no luck. She shrugged and said, "Nada. It's all the same history of the Hellmouth. These are the times I wish Giles were here."  
  
"You and me both, Dawnie," Willow said. Then a thought occurred to her. "Hey, has anyone looked up anything that has to do with Prophecies?"  
  
"That's a good idea," Gunn said, seconding Willow's question.  
  
"Well, let's see..." Dawn said, typing some phrases into her computer.  
  
Connor walked up behind her. She was a very pretty girl, and smart too. She seemed to know her demonology pretty well. He was still new to this dimension, so he didn't know too much about these... computers. So he asked her, "What do these machines do? Are they like books?"  
  
Dawn laughed. He was cute. When Buffy explained to her *how* Connor was Angel's son, she was confused, and very, very curious. He was quite a good looking guy, and well, he did need someone to help him out. Dawn was more than willing to, though Buffy objected to it, because of his "not-quite- human-ness". She told him, "They're kind of like books, just a whole bunch of them. You can get anything you want from the 'net. It's faster than digging though a whole bunch of big books, especially if your town is being overrun by a big bad demon."  
  
Willow smiled at her little protege. Dawn was turning into a little computer specialist. Soon, Willow wouldn't be needed to do that stuff anymore.  
  
"Oh..." was Connor's response, still confused.  
  
"It's like little puppy love," Gunn muttered to Fred.  
  
"Like you guys should talk," Cordelia said to them, obviously hearing Gunn's comment.  
  
There was a knock on the door just then.  
  
"Wonder who that could be," Willow said.  
  
Xander got up and opened the door. Much to his dismay, he found Anya standing there, a worried look on her face. "Anya," he said, surprised.  
  
"I want to help," she said. "I want to help you do your research thing."  
  
"And under what revelation did you decide this?" he asked.  
  
"I... Can I just come in?"  
  
"Sure, if you promise not to go vengeance-y on us," Xander told her, opening the door to let her though. She gave him a disgusted look and breezed passed him into the living room. He looked up to the sky, hoping nothing bad would come out of this. "Dear God, do not let her cause mayhem," he said quietly.  
  
"Anya?" Willow asked, standing up. "What are you doing here?" She noticed the worried look on her face. "What's wrong?"  
  
"I'm in the same rut you guys are in," she explained quickly. "This thing that's coming, I know you can feel it Willow. I want to help you find it, and kill it."  
  
It was Xander's turn to jump in. "Okay, so why are we going to listen to the Vengeance Demon?"  
  
Anya shot him a dirty look, and then continued to explain to Willow. "Whatever it is, it's not good for demon-kind either."  
  
"Anya?" Cordelia said, looking at a familiar face she hadn't seen in a long time.  
  
Anya looked at Cordelia, noticing her and the rest of the people in the living room for the first time. "Cordelia? Wow! Long time no see!"  
  
"Vengeance Demon?" Cordelia asked.  
  
"Yeah..." That's when Anya had a good look into Cordelia's eyes. "You're not... Hey, what happened to *you*?"  
  
"Demon. Well, half. I have visions of people in trouble," she explained.  
  
"Oh. Interesting."  
  
"Okay. Now that we've cleared up that my two exes are demons, can we please continue the, 'Why the hell are you here' conversation?" Xander asked, not liking this reunion one bit.  
  
Anya sighed. "Demons, humans, everyone is in trouble. It's power, pure power."  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Buffy sat on top of a gravestone in the cemetery. She was playing around with the stake in her hand. "Mr. Pointy's not getting any action tonight," she commented, apparently bored.  
  
"If this is what Sunnydale's been like since I left, I'm glad I haven't been back," Angel joked. "Not even a vamp, this is strange."  
  
"You're telling me. I know I should be happy, but jeez. This is ridiculous."  
  
There was a moment of silence. So many thoughts about Buffy ran through his mind. Every night they talked. It almost felt like old times, but there was a barrier there. Buffy was hiding something from him. It was almost obvious that it had to do a lot about his soul. She asked too many questions about him, and it. Tonight was a perfect time to discuss things. "So, what's up Buffy?"  
  
"What do you mean?" she asked.  
  
"You keep asking me about my soul. You haven't been so inquisitive about it since... Well, never. And for the past couple nights, that's all you seem to be stuck on," he told her, taking a seat next to her.  
  
Buffy observed him for a moment and then said, "You know, you're so much less broody. I think LA has done wonders for you."  
  
"Don't change the subject," he said seriously.  
  
"It's nothing. Can't I be curious?" she asked defensively. "You look into things too much."  
  
Angel was not buying it. "Can I see the new school?" he asked. "I mean, I think we should check it out, since it's Hellmouth-central..."  
  
Buffy was definitely against that idea. "It's just... I'm there all day, and there's nothing there."  
  
"Night? Demons like the night?" Angel proposed.  
  
She looked at him sternly. "I don't think there's anything to be seen there. It's... been quiet since the school was built. Well maybe except for the demons in the basement..." she trailed off, remembering she had already told Angel that. "But other than that, it's fine there, nothing demon-y. Don't you think we should go back to the house now? They might have uncovered something important." She got up and started walking back.  
  
"You're hiding something from me," he said to her, still sitting on the gravestone. "Why are you so afraid to tell me?"  
  
"I don't know what you're talking about," she muttered over her shoulder and kept walking.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
"...There's the one about Connor," Gunn explained to the crowd in the living room. "The baby born to two vampires, and then was supposed to be killed by Angel."  
  
Prophecies. That was their discussion. Dawn was at her computer in the dining room, with Connor, looking up passages on her computer. In the living room, everyone else was discussing all the prophecies that were fulfilled... or needed to be fulfilled.  
  
"Not so loud!" Cordelia whispered, looking in the direction of the dining room.  
  
"Well there was the one about Dawn, and Glory, and an apocalypse, but that's over and done with," Willow said.  
  
"Buff already died against the Master..." Xander said.  
  
"We graduated..." Willow added.  
  
"So this puts us in... Nowhere-land," Gunn stated, standing up.  
  
A thought sprung to Cordelia's mind at that moment. She remembered the Prophecies of Aberjian, the one Wesley translated a long time ago. It mentioned something about Angel, and apocalypses, and demons. Maybe this was why they were here? Was this the time Angel has been waiting for?  
  
"No, wait, I just thought of something," Cordelia said. Everyone's attention was on her. "Back before we met you, Gunn and Fred, Wesley had translated this scroll. It was the Prophecies of Aberjian. It said something about the vampire with a soul, Angel, of course, how he would turn human after surviving the apocalypse, coming darkness, stuff like that. Maybe this has something to do with it?"  
  
Everyone looked at her. Anya was the first person to speak up. "Are you sure it was talking about Angel?" she asked.  
  
"Last time we checked, Angel is the only vampire walking around this earth with a soul," Gunn said.  
  
"Of course..." Anya said, looking away. She knew different. Spike had a soul, and apparently, nobody else knew. Then something creeped into her memory. The Prophecies of Aberjian, she knew about. "I know that scroll. I don't know what it says exactly, but I have heard about it. It does say something about a vampire with a soul. It says he'll reach... Oh, what was that word again? Sh... Sh..."  
  
"Shanshu," Cordelia finished. "How do you know about them?"  
  
"Demon. Been around for thousands of years. I've seen and I remember a lot of things," Anya answered.  
  
At that moment, Buffy and Angel walked in.  
  
"Any new developments?" Buffy asked, setting her coat down on the couch. She noticed Anya sitting with the group when she looked up. "Oh, hey Anya. What are you doing here? You haven't gone vengeance-y did you?"  
  
"No, I'm here to help. There's a big bad thing coming, and it's not good for demons either," she explained. "I kind of want to stay alive."  
  
"Oh..."  
  
Willow spoke up by saying, "Well, I think we've come up with something though. Cordelia just mentioned this whole new prophecy. It has something to do with an apocalypse and Angel turning human." She smiled.  
  
"I think this deserves a big... '*HUH*'?" Buffy asked, confused.  
  
"Back when I first was in LA," Angel said, still standing behind Buffy, "I found this scroll. It turned out to be the Prophecies of Aberjian. Wesley translated some of it. It said that I would reach Shanshu, meaning I would turn human, after surviving an apocalypse, fighting a couple demons..."  
  
"It doesn't say Angel exactly," Anya said, ruining the hopeful mood of the rest of the room, "It says the vampire with a soul."  
  
"And that's Angel," Fred said. "He's the only vampire running around with a soul... Right?"  
  
"Right," Buffy said quickly, but not disregarding Anya's comment.  
  
Cordelia had a smile on her face. "So back to my theory. I think that's why we're here. Maybe this is what the Prophecies were talking about. Maybe this is Angel's chance to turn human."  
  
"Where's Dawn?" Buffy asked, finally noticing the absence of her sister.  
  
The question sparked Angel's attention as well. He noticed Connor wasn't in the room either. "Where's Connor?"  
  
"Oh, they're in the dining room. They're doing some research on Dawn's computer. We should let them in on what's going on," Willow said, standing up and starting to make her way to the dining room, followed by everyone else but Buffy and Anya.  
  
"You knew, that's why he tried to make you shut up," Buffy said to Anya quietly.  
  
"Of course I knew. It's not hard, being a demon and all," Anya told her. "You can see it. It's in his eyes. They're not empty anymore."  
  
"Neither is his mind," Buffy mumbled. "What does this mean?"  
  
Anya shook her head. "It means, that prophecy, the one that says the souled vampire will become human... Let's just say that Angel's got some competition. And that competition just happens to be Spike." The she realized that Buffy knew too. How did she find out? "How did you figure it out?"  
  
"I saw him after... When I left you and Xander there. He ran into a church, and in a mess of ramblings and riddles, he said he got his soul back. I don't know how, he didn't tell me," Buffy explained in a daze.  
  
"Stupid," Anya said quietly. "You know, I didn't mean to... It wasn't... We were..." It was her hopeless attempt at apologizing for what had happened between herself and Spike.  
  
Buffy's expression hardened just then. "Don't apologize."  
  
Anya nodded and took her leave into the dining room.  
  
Buffy just continued to sit in a daze. She had to do something. The only thing that was running through her mind was, *See Spike. Need to see Spike. Now.*  
  
She grabbed her coat and rushed outside.  
  
In the dining room, Angel heard the front door open and then close. Buffy. She left, with no word to anyone. He looked at Anya, who was still on the "are you sure it's Angel" kick. She knew something. Buffy knew something, and she was going to get to that something.  
  
He left the house with a quickness, following Buffy.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
To be continued...  
  
Okay, you guys have got it all wrong! The whole Buffy and Angel having a destiny together? I didn't mean it *that* why, oh gosh no. I meant that their paths are intertwined, you know.  
  
Thank you for not shunning me, Tigerwolf. *haha* Yeah, I'm in the same gray spot you are, being a B/S, B/A, A/C shipper, and I agree, B/A is goodness when it's in the past.  
  
Keep reading! More to come! Don't forget to R&R! =) 


	9. Chapter 8: Spy Games and Mind Games

Chapter 8: Spy Games and Mind Games  
  
"So you want me to pull up any information on the Prophecies of... what was that again?" Dawn asked, still sitting at her computer.  
  
"Aberjian," Cordelia said, pulling up a chair next to her.  
  
Anya was less than reassuring in her responses to everything. "Well, if you do happen to find it, which will be hard, it will most-likely be in another language. It's going to be hard to translate it. I'm surprised you got as far the first time," she said, waving her hand in the air.  
  
"Anya, could we be a little bit more gung-ho about this? You're so skeptical," Willow said. "I don't understand why you're so timid." She walked over to behind Dawn. "I don't mean to be pushy here, but I think it might be faster if I used a little magic," she told Dawn.  
  
Dawn looked Willow straight in the eye, unsure about her offer. "Are you sure you want to? I mean, it's still..."  
  
"Dawnie, it's... Please, let me try," Willow asked. Dawn slowly stood up and let her take her seat. "Okay, let's see if I can still do this right," Willow told the rest of the group. She placed her hands over the keyboard and concentrated. A bright light could be seen emanating from the small laptop. Everyone was looking at her with their head tilted to one side, wondering what she was doing, at the exception of Dawn, Xander, and Anya of course.  
  
"What is she doing?" Fred whispered to Xander.  
  
"It's like mystical hacker stuff," Xander whispered back. "She's going through info. She can see it through her mind."  
  
"I see some stuff. There's no complete versions of it though. Not on the 'net. The are just passages, which are in different languages," Willow explained. "Oh, wait. I just found something. It's a version of it. Not complete, but most of it is there." She suddenly snapped out of the little trance she was in and typed something on the laptop, which conveniently stopped radiating light. "Okay, there it is," she said, pulling up something on the computer.  
  
Everyone huddled around the computer. Anya was right. This thing was in a completely different language that any one of them has seen before.  
  
"So now that we have this, what do we do now?" Gunn asked.  
  
"Translate it," Anya said, shoving herself to the front of the crowd to get a good look at it. "This is going to take a long, long time."  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Buffy quickly made her way to the high school, in through the doors, and down into the basement, and intent on finding Spike.  
  
Angel kept a good distance between himself and Buffy. Spying on her wasn't the best of things to do, but she wasn't letting him in on something. Something sparked in her during that whole conversation about the Prophecies and the Shanshu. He had to find out. She had left the house in such a rush, not even saying she was leaving. He was starting to worry about her.  
  
She really didn't know where she was going. She was just trying to find Spike. She knew she was being careless about this, but that was the last thing on her mind. The same phrase kept repeating itself over and over in her mind, "The vampire with a soul will reach Shanshu... will turn human." It was unbelievable, and inconceivable. Angel wasn't the only one with a soul now either, which made the prophecy more perplexing. Weren't prophecies supposed to be a bit more descriptive?  
  
Buffy continued to push her way through the confusing corridors, with Angel keeping a steady pace behind her.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
"We need brains like Giles," Anya moaned as she tried to read the copy of the prophecy on the computer. She had a pieces of paper sprawled around the dining room table with etchings of translations on them.  
  
"Or Wesley," Cordelia added, examining a paper with Anya's handwriting. "You're apparently not writing in English. What *is* this?"  
  
"Some demon-language I know. I'm trying to match up any of these symbols with it. It may be easier for me to begin to translate this thing," Anya explained. Then she looked over to Willow and asked, "Do you know any magic so that this scroll would just go 'poof it's translated' for us?"  
  
Willow raised her eyebrows and answered with, "We can do a lot with magic, but we can't just translate text." Then she joked, "If we could, I'd actually understand half the things I was chanting."  
  
Xander and Dawn found that less than funny.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Angel was getting a little worried. He was afraid Buffy didn't know where she was going. The corridors of the school's basement were like a labyrinth. It was like they moved every time he looked back.  
  
"Spike?" she called out suddenly.  
  
*Spike?* Angel thought surprisingly. Why was she calling for Spike? Was he down here? Well, obviously he was down here, but what was he doing here? He focused more on his surroundings, and more on Buffy.  
  
She wasn't getting anything. No movement, no nothing. Was he even still down here? It seemed like he wasn't. Not anymore. "Spike?" she called out again. And again, nothing. "Spike, if you're down here, please come out. I need to talk to you."  
  
Then, like he just materialized out of nowhere, he was behind her and said, "You're here again. Why are you here again?"  
  
Startled, she turned around. "Where... No, that's not the question. Spike, I need to talk to you about something. Are you... Okay to talk?" she asked apprehensively.  
  
Spike looked around, and then back at her. "You shouldn't be here. It's not safe for you here."  
  
"When is it *ever* safe for me?"  
  
"They keep telling me, you shouldn't be here. She shouldn't come here anymore. It's not time yet. She will come here when it is time," he started rambling.  
  
Buffy was intrigued. Did Spike know something? "What are you talking about?"  
  
"It says that you're not supposed to be here," he told her. "I can't talk to you here. They tell me that you... No. You can't be here." His eyes were suddenly ripe with fear.  
  
She was concerned. What on earth was Spike talking about? She needed to talk to him, and if he couldn't do it here, she would have to take him somewhere else. "If you can't talk here, what do you say we go somewhere else?" she said softly, trying to take the fear away from him.  
  
He stepped back away from her. "Don't... Can't... leave here. I belong here. This is where I'm supposed to stay," he said.  
  
"Spike, please."  
  
He noticed something in her eyes just then. A spark. Was she trying to help, or was she just planning on using him again? He was afraid of her. He didn't mean to hurt her. There was something in her voice, like a gentle lullaby.  
  
She was reluctant to do what she did next. She wanted to comfort him, but was afraid to touch him, since he was so defensive about it. She just wanted to place her hand on him, just to make him feel all right. She was testing her waters when she held out her hand to him and asked softly, "Come with me, please."  
  
Spike was just as reluctant as she was. He didn't know if he should take her hand or not. He reached out and paused, looking back into her eyes. They were such pretty eyes. One could easily fall into them, and he was the perfect example. He shook that thought away and gently touched her hand.  
  
That was when he had a flash. He heard her voice ringing with rage as she said to him, "Ask me again why I could *never* love you," her face streaked with tears. He pulled his hand away. "I can't..." he said, looking away. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry... Didn't want to hurt..."  
  
"Spike, I need to talk to you. This is about... everything," she said. It was more desperate this time. "Please come with me." She never put her hand down. "Look at me, Spike. You need help. No one but Anya and I know, and if you want it to stay that way, let me help you. Come with me."  
  
He turned his head again to look at her. He tried again to take her hand, and succeeded, without the flashes.  
  
"Thank you," she said, nodding her head once, and began to lead him out of the dark and dreary basement.  
  
Angel looked on with curiosity. Spike and Buffy. Were they really talking like this? And what in the world was wrong with Spike? What was it that Buffy and Anya knew about Spike? Something weird was going on here. Spike didn't seem to be all good in the head. Quite frankly, he was acting crazed. No doubt, something had to have happened because it looked like he was afraid of Buffy. He was afraid to touch her.  
  
Angel silently followed the two as they made their way out of the basement, never taking his eyes off of the fact that Buffy had Spike's hand in hers.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
To be continued...  
  
Short chapter, I know! Sorry about that. I'm kind of dealing with midterms in three different classes this week, and my brain has been totally fried, hence no creative juices flowing though. It's more like all technical terms floating though this brain of mine. =( Ahhh!!! Stop the madness! Don't worry, more coming soon... (Yeah, I'm starting to ramble. I'm going to stop now.) R&R! 


	10. Chapter 9: Insight

Chapter 9: Insight  
  
Angel stalked in the shadows, observing this interaction between, as far as he knew, mortal enemies.  
  
They were outside now, in the cold night. Buffy had led Spike to a bench just outside the school. Spike just sat there, in what looked like a tranquilized state. He just sat there, staring into nothingness, not really acknowledging Buffy's presence.  
  
Buffy took a seat next to him, carefully placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "Okay, Spike. You haven't been in the best of... mind-state lately, but we... need your help," she said softly.  
  
"Help. Helping is good," Spike replied, still staring off into space. "I'm not good. I'm a bad, bad person. Wanted to help, but I still hurt..." He looked at Buffy just then. "I hurt you."  
  
She tilted her head to the side. She knew what he was referring to, and she wasn't prepared to take on that subject just yet.  
  
"It hurts me, Buffy. In here," he gestured to his head, "when I think about it. And it hurts me in here," he placed his hand over his still heart, "because I keep seeing that expression on your face," he paused, "after."  
  
Buffy didn't know what to say.  
  
"I'm sorry..." he said, noticing the look on her face. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I shouldn't be around you. I've been bad, so bad. William's a bad man." He turned away, sulking over and grabbing his head in his hands.  
  
'William..." Buffy repeated softly, realizing that he referred to himself as William.  
  
"That's who I am," Spike said. "It's who I've always been. Spike is the body. William is the soul. We're both in here, you know. We're both hurting, because we both love you." He turned around and looked at her, a completely innocent look in his eyes.  
  
"I know you got your soul back because of me," Buffy said quietly.  
  
He nodded. "I wanted to give you... What you deserved. You didn't want me because I was a monster. I *am* a monster, because... because," he drooped his head, "It didn't help."  
  
"What?"  
  
"This," he said, meaning his soul. "He's done so much he's sorry for. He wanted to be yours so bad... like Angel. You called me an evil, soul-less thing. Tell me, do you still think that you can't love without a soul?"  
  
"Spike..." Buffy started, "I can't talk about this now." She was desperate to change the subject. "We need you help. Please, can you help us?" Then, after seeing the semi-hurt look in his eyes, she told him, "I promise. We will talk about what happened."  
  
He nodded, slowly, hesitantly. "I'll help. I will be good," he said.  
  
"Good. Then you have to tell me what you know. I keep hearing, 'From beneath you, it devours.' What does that mean? Do you know what's coming?" Buffy asked, getting straight to the point.  
  
Spike's expression got dark, and sad. "Time will tell. It's power, who holds it. It's not evil. It's not good. You can't stop it. It comes and swallows you, and by the time..." he swallowed, "by the time you realize, it's too late. It's as old as time. It has always been."  
  
Buffy was confused. "So what you're saying is that it's hopeless? We can't stop it? Well, that's what we thought about Glory, and guess what? We beat her."  
  
"And you died," he said softly, reluctantly. He remembered how he cried, and cried over her death. "I'm sorry," he mumbled. "I will save her. I will always save her. To death..." He was starting to ramble again.  
  
Angel was extremely confused. He didn't know what to think right now. Buffy and Spike. Spike and Buffy. *Spike has a soul,* was the thought that kept repeating itself in his head. Anya knew. That was why Anya kept pressing the subject of the prophecy. That was why she kept asking if they were sure it was talking about him. Did Xander, Willow, and Dawn know? Buffy definitely knew. That was why she kept asking him about his soul.  
  
What really hit him hard was the fact that Spike's soul wasn't a curse. He got it for Buffy. Spike sounded like he wanted redemption, but not like he did. Then again, Spike was acting odd. He was talking about himself like he was two people. It seemed as though his soul did not suppress the demon part of him, not that much at least.  
  
*He got his soul for Buffy,* he thought to himself. It was unbelievably... selfless. What could have changed Spike so much to do that? Had he fallen in love with Buffy? Yes, he had. He said it, and it looked like Buffy knew it for a long time.  
  
"Something is here," Spike said suddenly.  
  
"I know," Buffy said, thinking he was still talking about the "thing" that was coming.  
  
He surveyed the area. "No. Something is watching us."  
  
"What?" Buffy stood up quickly, ready to pounce on anything that came out of the darkness. "Show yourself," she said sternly.  
  
Spike was on his feet too. He was looking around the courtyard. He felt the presence of someone familiar. Someone was near.  
  
Angel heard this and backed off. He couldn't let Buffy find him. He turned around and quickly took his leave.  
  
"It's gone," Spike whispered.  
  
*He's definitely loony,* Buffy thought, *Must've been the "voices" he was talking about...*  
  
That was when Spike started to walk back toward the school.  
  
"Where are you going?" Buffy asked.  
  
He kept walking, and over his shoulder he said, "Back to where I belong."  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
The Summers house was quiet again. Everyone had retired for the night. When Angel returned, he found Connor asleep on the couch. His son. It was still unbelievable that he had a son. It was one thing he thought he would never have. It made him content.  
  
Not long after Angel returned, Buffy quietly stepped through the front door. She had a somber expression on her face. It was either that or she was just tired. Then again, she had just gotten back from seeing Spike, whose current state made her worry.  
  
She noticed Angel sitting down in the living room, awake. "Hi, Angel," she greeted quietly, careful not to wake up Connor.  
  
"Where have you been?" he asked, no apparent emotion on his face.  
  
She needed to think of an excuse. What came out of her mouth was, "I just needed to take a walk. All that talk about that prophecy made me all woozy." She smiled. "You have a chance to turn human. It's just... unbelievable."  
  
Angel nodded. It was unbelievable, but now he was having doubts to whether he was the one the prophecy was talking about. "It is isn't it? After all these centuries, not being able to live like a man..."  
  
Buffy shook her head. "Becoming human doesn't necessarily make you a man, Angel." She was defensive, and she sounded knowledgeable. "It's your actions, your emotions, to yourself, and to other people."  
  
Angel was shocked, she didn't sound like the Buffy he knew... or used to know. "I understand what you're saying, Buffy, but it feels like... This is what I've been seeking."  
  
She kept shaking her head. "It's a reward to you," she said simply. "Your soul is a curse to you, Angel. You've looked at it that way for years and years and years. Have you ever stopped to think that it was a blessing? You used to brood over it, but I see you now, and you're content."  
  
Speechless. Since when did Buffy become so insightful?  
  
"You know, we shouldn't be talking about this. We should just be happy about it," she said. "I'm going to sleep. Goodnight." She made her way upstairs.  
  
Reward. It *was* a reward. Of course, that's all it was. So many good deeds were done to make up for what he caused. Centuries of redemption, for the centuries he caused massacres. Humanity. It was life. He wanted to be able to love fully. He wanted to be able to feel the warmth of the sun. He wanted to feel his heart beating.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Connor had heard the whole conversation, and as much as he hated to admit it, Buffy was right about his father. Reaching humanity was almost like a goal for him. Ever since he had his soul back, that was what he wanted. Connor knew this. It was as if what he had wasn't enough. He had to have it all- hat was why he bothered saving people, helping people. That was what kept the inhumanness in his father.  
  
The girl that his father once loved, the girl who was centuries younger that he... she knew. It saddened Connor, why his father couldn't see what she saw. He fell back asleep, troubled by thoughts of his father.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
To be continued...  
  
Sorry, the brain is not functioning on the higher levels. I tried to make this chapter as interesting as possible, but my brain is still swimming with info from all three classes I had exams in. But... THE WEEK FROM HELL IS OVER!!! YAY!!! =) R&R please! 


	11. CHapter 10: Plans

Chapter 10: Plans  
  
"Summers!"  
  
Dawn turned around to see the person who was calling her name. She smiled when she saw who it was. His name was Chad Johnson, and he sat next to her in English. He ran up to her hurriedly.  
  
"What's up Chad?" Dawn asked, seeing he held a test they just got back in his hand. She gestured to it and asked, "How'd you do?"  
  
He rolled his eyes and told her, "I hate this class." He smiled, dismissing the subject totally and then asked, "So, you have a date to the Winter Formal yet?" He scratched the back of his head, his eyes glancing away from hers.  
  
*Me! He's asking me to the Formal!* Dawn thought with excitement. The dance was already just two weeks away. She smiled right back at him and said, "Nope."  
  
"Well I was wondering if... I mean, I don't have a date yet either..." The words just weren't coming out of his mouth. He quickly regrouped and blurted out, "Will you go to the dance with me?"  
  
Dawn was all smiles as she said, "Sure."  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Buffy sat at her desk, twirling a pencil in her hand. It was so boring here. At least, today was. Kids were being sent to her off and on, but no real news. There were just the usual problems. It was so boring she actually wished she were in class. At least there would be a monotone teacher's voice that could put her to sleep.  
  
"Buffy!" Dawn burst through the door and into her cubicle.  
  
"Aren't you supposed to be in class?" Buffy asked.  
  
"I still have five minutes. I just wanted to come by and tell you that I have a date to the Formal!"  
  
Buffy felt herself ease into legal-guardian mode. "Okay, now you have to tell me his name, first and last, where he lives, and how old he is," she said half-serious and half-kidding. "I need to do a background check so I know he's normal and not all demon-y."  
  
Dawn's jaw dropped. She had to be kidding.  
  
Buffy let out a laugh. "I'm not completely serious. I want a name and age."  
  
"Chad Johnson, and he's fifteen," Dawn replied. "He's in my English class, third period."  
  
Her sister smirked.  
  
"Don't give me that look, Buffy. *Do not* go all stalker-protective sister on me. He's a perfectly normal, and perfectly cute guy. I swear, if you mess this up for me..." Dawn warned. She stood up. "I have to get to class. I'll see you after school."  
  
Buffy shook her head as her sister walked out. Dawn was definitely growing up.  
  
"I couldn't help but overhearing your sister's excitement." Principal Wood was standing at the end of her cubicle. "Date for the Formal, right?"  
  
"Yeah. It begins, the evolution of my little sister into a teenage horror," Buffy said, chuckling to herself. "Everyone is so excited about this dance. That's what everyone's coming to me about today- advice on how to ask someone to the dance. I never realized that it was so hard."  
  
"You can't tell me you haven't had your own issues with asking someone out when you were in high school," the principal said.  
  
That was definitely the biggest understatement of the year. "Oh, I had issues all right," was her response to Principal Wood's comment. "It's just a dance anyway. Who would have thought asking someone would be the hardest part?"  
  
He shook his head, laughing softly. "You're quite a character Miss Summers. Speaking of the dance, though, can I count on you coming? As a chaperone of course."  
  
A chaperone? He had to be kidding. She looked like she was still young enough to be a student *going* to the dance. Is this what her life has succumbed to already? Hanging out with the teachers and administration at a high school dance? She answered him with, "I don't know. I think my sister will think I'm spying on her."  
  
"Don't worry about her. Bring a date, it'll be fun," he told her. "So you won't have to hang out with us old farts. Besides, the kids will probably be more comfortable if you're there as well, rather than just the... Oh, what was it that I overheard someone say? Oh yes, the 'stick-up-the-ass' administration."  
  
Buffy laughed at his comment. "I'll think about it," was her final answer.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
"Oh no... What are we going to do?" Willow mused at Buffy's news.  
  
"I don't know. This is such a big deal," Buffy said. "Where was I?"  
  
"I know the remedy," Cordelia said happily, a smile flashing across her face.  
  
Angel walked into the living room just then. He saw the concerned looks among the ladies' faces and automatically got worried. "What's up? Did you guys find out something important?" he asked with a voice full of concern.  
  
"It's Dawn," Willow said.  
  
Angel looked at Buffy, who was just staring into space at the moment. "Buffy. Are you alright? What happened to her?"  
  
"She got a date for the Winter Formal," Buffy simply said.  
  
"Dawnie's got a date," Willow repeated happily.  
  
Cordelia was quite happy. "You need to take that girl shopping! She needs a dress, and jewelry, and matching shoes... Oh, and a nail appointment, and I can do her makeup...!" She was definitely going on a tangent.  
  
Angel was confused. These girls were amazing, fussing over the most ridiculous things.  
  
Willow put a reassuring hand on Buffy's shoulder. "Oh Buff. You're just overreacting. Remember when we were in high school? And all the issues with boys, and dances, and..." High school years went into focus for her, and she remembered how less-than-normal they were. "I mean, we went through the same things... kind of."  
  
"Oh yeah, Willow. Like the vampires who would occasionally kidnap us, and the demons that would love to make our school a home?" Cordelia said sarcastically. "Please, what's the big deal anyway? Your sister got a date for the dance! Be happy! Stop being a mother-figure for once and be a big sister."  
  
"As much as I hate to say it, Cordy has a point," Willow said.  
  
Buffy sighed and shrugged. "That's not the only thing. Principal Wood asked me if I'd go to the dance and help chaperone. Have I really turned into one of those geeky parents?" she asked.  
  
"Now *that's* a whole different story," Cordelia told Buffy.  
  
"So are you gonna go?" Willow asked. "I mean, I think it would be a great idea, since the school's all Hellmouth-y, and it's gonna be at night and all."  
  
Buffy's mind was still on the chaperone thing. "He told me to bring a date," she said.  
  
"Oh," was Willow's response. "Then bring a date."  
  
"Who would I bring? You know my track record with guys has been..." she looked over at Cordelia and Angel, knowing she couldn't say anything too revealing, "less than normal."  
  
"Why are you guys making such a big deal about this?" Angel asked, not comprehending this whole conversation.  
  
Cordelia rolled her eyes. "You know the whole issue about parents and kids going out on dates. I mean, Buffy's like a mom to Dawn, you know? How would *you* feel if Connor decided to go out on a date?"  
  
"He doesn't understand the concept of dating yet, nor will he... Until I say so, of course," Angel stated.  
  
"And *that*," Cordelia stated, "proves my point."  
  
"You're worse than I am," Buffy muttered, and then smiled. "But Angel has a point too. We've got more important things to worry about."  
  
"Yeah, like getting you a date," Willow said, trying to keep the latter, upbeat conversation.  
  
Cordelia knew she was going to kick her own butt for the suggestion she was going to pull, but it was the only one that made sense. She looked over at Angel and said, "Why don't *you* go with her? It makes sense, since the school's on Hellmouth Central. If anything happens, what two better people to have there?"  
  
Buffy wanted to protest, but the girl had a point. It was a rather good point at that, but it was Angel. Buffy wasn't so sure it was a great idea- them... being together... at a dance.  
  
Angel wasn't sure about the idea either. He hadn't fought by her side in quite a long time. Then again, he hadn't been on a *date* with Buffy for a long time. He went to her prom, and it wasn't all "happy times" back then. He was going to leave her, which he eventually did.  
  
"She's right," Angel agreed and nodded his head. "We should keep an eye out. If it's okay with you, Buffy, I'd like to be your date." He flashed a smile in a half-hearted attempt to ease the situation.  
  
Now Buffy was completely unsure. Angel... date... dance. That equation wasn't going to work, in her mind at least. Then again, he *was* the best person to bring along, since Spike was (hopefully) temporarily incapacitated. Any big event at Sunnydale High was always accompanied with some supernatural activity. So Buffy let out a long breath and agreed to the idea, "Sure."  
  
Willow gave Buffy an "are you absolutely sure?" look.  
  
"Hey, it's okay. Problem fixed," Buffy said. "I not only have a date, I have a partner... just in case." She sounded just a little disappointed.  
  
Cordelia noticed Buffy's detachment from the idea of going with Angel. She looked at Buffy sideways and said, "You don't sound too excited about it. You actually look like you'd like to bring someone else."  
  
Buffy looked at Cordelia, wide-eyed, and almost innocently. Did she really look like that? "What do you mean? I had no one else in mind... really. You know me, I have this thing with dating less-than-normal guys, and... um... well, I haven't been in the dating pool for a while," she said, not sure if her words were convincing.  
  
Just then, the front door opened. Xander, Gunn, and Fred walked in.  
  
"So, what are we doing tonight, kids?" Xander greeted, a smile on his face. "Is it going to be another night of research-filled fun?"  
  
"I don't know about you guys, but this nightly research thing is getting too stressful, and to be quite honest, it's going absolutely nowhere. I mean has Anya had some breakthrough with the translating of the prophecy? I need a break already!" Cordelia complained, and sat back on the couch.  
  
"I second that motion," Gunn said, raising his hand. "What's there to do in this town?"  
  
"About the only nightlife in this town is The Bronze," Willow said.  
  
"That place is still around?" Angel asked.  
  
"Yup. It's reopened and revamped... Well, not revamped in the literal sense," Willow said, smiling. "It's still the cool hangout in Sunnydale."  
  
"So who's in for The Bronze tonight?" Xander asked cheerily.  
  
There were nods from everyone.  
  
"What about Dawn and Connor?" Fred asked.  
  
Buffy and Angel looked at each other. Buffy shrugged. "Well, if Dawn's good with her homework, I don't mind her coming with."  
  
Angel shrugged after Buffy's decision. "Connor can come along. He can man his own if anything happens."  
  
"Finally a break from all this!" Cordelia exclaimed and stood up. "Well until then, I'm going to get some beauty rest." She left the group of people and headed upstairs.  
  
Buffy looked at Willow and said, "This should be an interesting night."  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Spike stood outside of Buffy's house, leaning against the tree he usually occupied. He saw her inside, sitting on the couch with Willow. They were talking, about what, he didn't know. He was perfectly content watching her. Every now and then, she would crack that irresistible smile that turned him to mush on many occasions. Xander would enter the room occasionally, probably saying something completely idiotic, but that was Xander nonetheless. The Lil' Bit would run into the living room sometimes too, hangers of clothes in her hands, probably asking Buffy if an outfit looked good. It saddened him to be outside and looking in, when he wished he were there inside with them, enjoying whatever conversation they were having.  
  
His eyes were fixated on Buffy. He imagined running his fingers through her silky blonde hair, and looking into those green eyes. He wanted to caress her face gently, with the back of his hand, and feel her warm skin against his. If only... if only. Buffy had already made him crazy, before he got the voices in his head.  
  
What he saw next was unexpected. The person who walked into the living room was the last person he expected to see... ever again. What was Angel doing in Buffy's house? Let alone, Sunnydale? He stood up straight and watched carefully.  
  
Angel sat down on the couch next to Buffy, and they were talking. He had no way of knowing what they were talking about, but it looked important, because Buffy didn't smile once. At one point, she actually looked like she was going defensive on Angel. In the midst of their conversation, another familiar face walked into the room. It was Cordelia. Then three others came in to join them.  
  
It was the Poofter Squad. What were they doing here? Spike was interested to know why they were there. He doubted that it was a just a visit.  
  
"They'll find out soon enough," a voice said behind him. He turned around to find Tara, or who he thought was Tara. An apparition maybe. She stood there, looking at him. She looked like she had all the wisdom in the world. She looked over to the window and said, "They think they can stop it. They don't even know where to begin."  
  
"Are you..."  
  
"Don't be silly. I'm not a ghost," she told him. "I'm here to help you, I suppose. You're supposed to be helping them in there you know. You're just as important in the game as they are."  
  
Spike was lost. He was probably hallucinating. It was another figment his unstable mind was thinking up. He blinked, thinking the figure would just go away.  
  
"I'm here to help. Don't forget that," she said, smiling. Then she backed away into the dark and was gone.  
  
He squinted a little, trying to find a trace of her, but there was none. So he looked back to the window, where he watched what was going on inside.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
"Who's Spike?" Fred asked innocently.  
  
Buffy and Angel looked up from their conversation. They were talking about Spike, of course. Angel kept asking Buffy where he was. Buffy kept giving him diverting answers.  
  
"Do we have to go through this again?" Buffy asked, seemingly annoyed.  
  
"Let me put this into perspective for everyone," Xander said. "Angel was Spike's Sire. Yadda, yadda. Spike was on a kick to kill Buffy when he first came here. Yadda, yadda. Angel went bad, Spike *helped* Buffy get to evil Angel, and then he left. Came back again, whining about his insane ex..." He noticed the annoyed and uncomfortable look on Cordelia's face. That was a day no one wanted to remember. Then he continued his story, "Couple months later, he came back looking for the Ring of Amarra..."  
  
"Yeah, and then came to LA and almost got Angel killed," Cordelia said.  
  
"Can I finish my story please?" Xander asked, annoyed. Cordelia waved her hand to continue. "Thank you. Well, then after that whole incident, Riley and the Initiative chipped Deadboy Jr. and he couldn't hurt any living things, just demons. Next thing we know, he's making googly-eyes at Buffy here, saying he's in love with her..."  
  
Cordelia let out a laugh. "You're kidding right? Spike? In love with Buffy? Oh this is just amusing! Are the only guys you attract, dead?" she asked Buffy, laughing uncontrollably.  
  
"I think I speak for everyone when I say, *shut up* Cordy," Xander said. There was only a brief pause, then he continued, "But that doesn't matter... the whole googly-eyes part. He ended up being, as much as I hate to admit it, a great ally. Though he's still a pain in the ass, and I'd still really love to stake him." He looked at Buffy, a stone-cold look in his eyes.  
  
Willow jumped into the story. "He's not such a bad guy. I mean, Glory *tortured* him, and he still wouldn't give up that Dawn was the Key. Then he went out on a limb and helped us with the whole stopping of the, like sixth apocalypse and stuff. And... he kept a watch of Dawn when Buffy was... not here," she explained reasonably.  
  
Angel was giving Buffy a "how come you never told me any of this?" look. Buffy just kept on looking at him innocently. She didn't feel that she had a right to tell him, or that he even had a right to know. He was the one who walked out of Sunnydale.  
  
"So wait a minute, this Spike guy... is he good or bad then?" Gunn asked.  
  
It was Buffy's turn to speak. "Good... in a bad way," she said, unsurely. "I mean, he helps out a lot... He's annoying... but..."  
  
Xander was giving her almost a menacing look.  
  
"I'm going to shut up now. Spike is Spike. There's your explanation. No one ever knows what's going on in the inner workings of his mind," she finally said.  
  
"So, wait a minute," Fred started, "Spike... is in love with Buffy, right? But Angel, I thought you and Buffy were..."  
  
"Over," Buffy said quickly. "Like three years ago over. Kind of got the message that us, having a relationship and all, not going to work. And please, let's *not* talk about Spike being... *in love* with me."  
  
Angel looked a Buffy. He still loved her, of course. He would never stop loving her, but they had no future together. He couldn't ever love her like she deserved to be loved. She deserved more than just him.  
  
"I agree with Buffy," Angel said. "We've got the history on Spike. That's all we need to know, really. Where is he though? You still have to tell me that much, Buffy." He was looking dead at her.  
  
"He's living in the high school basement, busy being all insane and nutty," Xander said. "He left before the summer, don't know where he went, next thing we know, he's back, and he's off his rocker."  
  
"This Spike-centered conversation is getting aggravating. Let's just say he messed up all our lives, greatly. Can we go to The Bronze now?" Cordelia asked, getting impatient. She was tapping her foot on the floor.  
  
"For once, she has a point," Xander said, pointing his finger at her. "Let's just go, and *not* talk about the annoying vampire anymore." He turned around and started heading to the door, the others following him after a moment.  
  
Buffy grabbed her purse and started following the crowd. Angel stopped her before she could get to the door. He grabbed her arm. "What?" she asked, snapping around.  
  
"There's more to you and Spike," he told her seriously. "I don't know what you're not telling me, but there's more. Why won't you let me in?"  
  
"It's none of your business, Angel. You haven't been here in, what? Three years? Now suddenly you make an appearance out of nowhere and you expect me to be all open arms with you? Let me tell you something, it doesn't work that way," she spat at him. "If there was anything going on between Spike and I, *you* wouldn't be the first to know. All you need to know is that I moved on with my life... Without you in it."  
  
Angel was speechless. He didn't know what to say. He saw it with his own eyes. Spike and Buffy. Talking, he expressed his love to her, how he got his soul for her. His expression grew somber at the thought and said, "There was once I time when you would tell me everything."  
  
She smiled, sighed, and said, "We're friends. You and me. We'll never be as close as we once were. There was a time, where... it was so apparent that we just couldn't be friends. God, we loved each other so much. But it's over, Angel, please accept that." When he didn't say anything she told him, "When I told you... that I would start forgetting, you knew, and I knew we'd never forget. No matter how long we were apart, there's no forgetting. But there's moving, and that's what I did."  
  
The flashes going through his mind were unbearable. He wished she had those memories of them being together. He was human, and happy. He was able to be with her, and make her happy. He got to see the sun rise with her, and they were able to walk in the daylight, holding each other. But it was hopeless, she'd never remember. He let go of her arm. "I'm sorry, Buffy. You're right," he told her.  
  
She smiled at him, nodded, and followed the others out of the house.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
When the others emerged from the house, Spike hid himself in the shadows, being careful not to let them see him. He heard someone say they were all going to The Bronze. Spike looked into the window again to find Buffy and Angel engaged in, what looked like, a serious talk. He had her arm, and she was talking to him, a hint of anger in her expression.  
  
He should have been in there, to lead Buffy out and away from Angel. What was it with the Poof? Did he have to have every lady Spike ever loved? If he were feeling a little stronger, he'd give Angel a mouthful. But the fact was, he wasn't strong enough yet. Hell, he wasn't even strong enough or had the courage enough to see Buffy on his own. He was back to just watching her from afar, or letting her come to him.  
  
But whenever she spoke to him, everything that would come out of his mouth didn't make sense. He couldn't form sentences when she was around. She made him go crazy. He couldn't be with her, and he couldn't be without her. It was a horrible cycle.  
  
He yearned so much to be what she wanted. She deserved so much better. This soul wasn't enough, it would never be enough. If he could, he would give her the world. If he could, he wouldn't have to be fighting these monsters within himself anymore. If he could, he'd be a man.  
  
As Buffy and Angel walked out of the house, Spike sank back deep into the shadows of the night.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
To be continued...  
  
Ah! So the brain is beginning to process ideas of Spuffyness again! =) R&R please! More coming soon! 


	12. Chapter 11: The Bronze

WARNING!!! MINOR SPUFFYNESS!!!  
  
Yeah, I'm all about the Spuffyness because of the mere LACK of it in this week's episode! Grrr...  
  
Chapter 11: The Bronze  
  
Buffy sat at the bar, looking on at her friends having a blast on the dance floor. She could see Xander strutting his stuff with Willow, who was smiling happily. Gunn and Fred were right next to them, bopping along with the music. Angel was with Cordelia at a table, just talking, each of them cracking smiles every now and then. Dawn and Connor were at the pool table, Dawn trying to teach Connor the basics of the game.  
  
And then there was her. She was all alone at the bar, carelessly stirring around the olive in her martini. She was bored, but she wasn't about to rain on the good time her friends were having. It was beginning to become a normal thing- her being by herself. It wasn't always a bad thing. She remembered the days when she actually *wished* she was by herself, with no one fussing over what she had to do next.  
  
Actually, it was a good thing she was alone. There were too many things running through her mind. She couldn't believe how Angel was acting. He made her so angry, or just irked her, since he got here. It wasn't that she minded him "watching over" her, it was just the fact that he was *always* there, like a shadow or something.  
  
In about a minute, she'd be ordering shots of tequila. *No Buffy. Remember that incident with tequila, and Spike? No. Don't want to get drunk and not be able to fight, and then get sick,* she scolded herself. She downed the martini and decided to step outside for some fresh air.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
"This town hasn't changed one bit," Cordelia said to Angel. "The people have, but the town definitely hasn't. I'm *so* happy I decided to relocate to LA."  
  
Angel smiled at Cordelia. Same old Cordelia. "You and me both," he told her.  
  
She looked at him, feeling his comment was filled with a little contempt. "Are you sure? Seems like you've jumped back into your role as Buffy's 'protector'," she said to him.  
  
"Protector? What are you talking about?"  
  
"Oh please! Angel, you're acting like you always have around Buffy. You follow her like a lost puppy or something. No, not a lost puppy- you follow her like an over-protective boyfriend. Then again, that's what you were," Cordelia said. "Newsflash, Angel, you're not her boyfriend anymore."  
  
"Cordy," Angel said, "I'm not acting any different than how I would if it was any other person in trouble. Buffy is just... different. We've been through so much..."  
  
She let out a chuckle and said, "Like, sending you to a hell dimension?"  
  
He gave her a scowl, but it only lasted for a second. "*Besides* that. We've got history, that's all. I care about her too much to let anything bad happen to her." He looked over to where Buffy was sitting at the bar. She looked bored, playing with her drink and all.  
  
"I don't know. You two are the everlasting mystery... to everyone," she said. The quietly, she asked, "Do you still love her?"  
  
Angel sighed. The answer to that was complicated. Of course he still loved her. He loved her more than anything in the world, but it was a love that couldn't go anywhere. It was a love that could only last in a dream. "Of course I do," he told Cordelia, "But it's difficult. We can't ever-"  
  
"We know the story," she said, interrupting him. She was obviously distraught by his answer, and annoyed.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
"Okay, so you hold the pool stick like this..." Dawn instructed as she showed Connor how to hold the stick. "And then you can hit the ball." She aimed and struck the ball with the tip of the stick. It hit the one and sent it into a corner pocket. "See? Now you try."  
  
Connor was a bit clumsy with this game. He took the stick from Dawn's hand and mimicked how she held it and then finally to when he hit the ball, not particularly aiming at anything. It was a blunder. He hit the ball too hard and it bounced around the table until it finally landed itself in a pocket.  
  
"Um... That's great, but the whole point is *not* to hit the white ball into a pocket. See, what you do is hit the white ball so it hits another, colored ball," Dawn explained.  
  
"Which one do I hit?" he asked.  
  
"Well, I'll skip the rules of the game, just hit the ball," she told him and laughed.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Buffy stood outside, leaning against the wall. It was quiet out here, and that's what she really needed- quiet. Besides, she was still on the lookout for her friends. Even though they were on a "break" Buffy knew that she wasn't. She would never be, until this whole thing was over.  
  
"Buffy," she heard a familiar voice say. She followed the voice and ended up in a dead-end alley. There, leaning against a dumpster was Spike. He looked a bit more level-headed than when she last saw him. He was just standing there, looking calm, maybe even collected. "Didn't think you'd show," he told her, looking down at the ground. "Hell, who am I kidding? I didn't think you'd hear me."  
  
"I did," she said stoically. "What are you doing here, Spike?"  
  
He shrugged and asked, "What are *you* doing here? Nonetheless with the Poofter Squad. What are they doing here?"  
  
"Help," she said. "They're here because... they need to be here."  
  
"I'm sure they are," he muttered.  
  
"Spike, it's not about them. They just came here. I don't know *why* they came here, or why they're even staying. They're here, I think, because... they know. They know that something's coming," Buffy explained. Then, changing the subject, she asked, "What are you doing out?"  
  
He looked at her innocently and said, "I thought you wanted me out of the basement? This is the only place I could think to go." He cocked his head to the side. "You're right, you know. The voices aren't as loud up here."  
  
Buffy looked away for a moment. Okay, maybe he wasn't *that* collected. She put a hesitant hand on his arm, and found that he was shaking, just a little. "What's wrong? Are you okay?" she asked, concerned. She did a quick sweep of his body. He didn't look okay, like he wasn't feeding all that well. Buffy took her hand away and stepped back. "Come here, Spike," she said in a commanding voice.  
  
Spike looked at her unsure of what she was asking. He pushed himself up so he was standing straight. Then he took a step toward her, and then another. He was swaying a bit, and then finally his legs gave out on him and he started falling toward her. Instead of letting him fall, she rushed toward him and caught him. He felt so sleepy, suddenly.  
  
"Come on, I'm taking you inside," she said gently, throwing his arm around her shoulders to steady him.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Cordelia noticed that Angel kept looking over to the bar, keeping a close eye on Buffy. The last conversation they had didn't seem to matter much. He was still acting like her protector. That guy just wouldn't quit, though Buffy apparently was making it clearly obvious to everyone that the whole "Angel" situation was over and done with.  
  
"For God's sakes Angel! Can you for once, while you're in this town, unwind? Buffy's a big girl and can take care of herself. And even if she died... again... you know she'd come back, like she always does. That girl's immortal or something," Cordelia told Angel, a touch of contempt in her voice.  
  
"That's the thing, Cordy," Angel replied, "Buffy's not acting like Buffy. She's distant. I could completely understand her being distant towards us, but to her friends? I don't understand. I know it's been hell for her since she came back. Willow pulled her out of heaven, did you know that?" He looked at Cordelia with a raised eyebrow.  
  
She was speechless. She didn't know what to say to that. Eternal peace for Buffy, and she was torn out of happiness and whatever she was feeling up there.  
  
"She's been keeping things from everybody. I know it. I should know it, I've been the king of secrets for my entire un-life. I could even say that it's not Buffy anymore, but a shell of her," he continued. "You keep asking me what happened when Buffy and I met up last year? This is what we talked about. She told me where she was, how she was torn out, and how she felt. She felt empty and unhappy. Buffy told me she thought she wouldn't be able to feel again. She said she was happy to be out of this world, because all she felt here was pain, and that's not what she wanted."  
  
"Oh God..." was Cordelia's only reaction. "I'm sorry Angel. I didn't mean..."  
  
He gave her a comforting smile and a reassuring squeeze on her shoulder. "Don't worry about it. I'm glad I told you. You don't know how much I appreciate your concern. I know I don't show emotion so much, but just know I love having you around, Cordy."  
  
Cordelia's gaze drifted to the bar and to Buffy. She saw her finish her drink and get up. Then she just walked out of the club. She was gone. "Um, Angel. I think you might want to get into protective-mode. Buffy left," she told him.  
  
Angel looked around. Buffy wasn't at the bar anymore, or anywhere in the club for that matter.  
  
"Go look for her," Cordelia said to Angel.  
  
He nodded and walked quickly toward the exit.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Dawn laughed at Connor's feeble attempt to play pool. He sure was cute, being all innocent. Sure, he was technically a year old, but then again, *she* was technically only two years old. He was quite interesting, not at all like Angel, well not like the Angel that Dawn remembered. The always brooding, unemotional... poof, to put it in Spike-terms. Connor was like a regular teenage boy, kind of, if you forget the part about being born to two vampires.  
  
She noticed Buffy sitting all alone at the bar. She kind of felt bad for her sister, since she was pretty much being singled-out. It looked like everyone had a "partner" of some sort, and she was left all by herself at the bar. Buffy didn't even look like she was having a good time. She sat there staring into her drink.  
  
"Dawn, what's wrong?" Connor asked, noticing her attention was elsewhere.  
  
"Buffy..." she said, "She's all by herself at the bar, and I feel kind of bad. I mean, look at her, she looks so depressed."  
  
Connor looked over to the bar, where Buffy was sitting. Dawn was right, Buffy did look pitiful. "Ah, don't worry about her. She's probably just tired, or just thinking. My father does that a lot."  
  
"You think I don't know that? Angel is the king of brooding and all sorts of unhappy," Dawn told Connor. "God, if you only knew how he was back then... Well, they're all memories, I know, but they were real. That's all that matters."  
  
Interested, Connor came up behind Dawn and asked, "How *was* my father back then? I wish I knew more about him, but... I can't ask. I do remember him telling me Buffy sent him to a hell dimension?"  
  
"You might want to pull up a chair for this one..." Dawn said, walking over to a table. "This is going to be a long story."  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
"I can't go inside," Spike told her, flat out. "Your friends... I can't..."  
  
"Spike, you need to sit down. I may not be the expert on vampire health, but I know enough to know you're not okay. You need me to help you walk!" she told him. "Please tell me you've fed."  
  
He nodded at her, weakly. "I have."  
  
As much as she didn't want to bring up *what* he's been feeding on, she had to. She lifted her eyebrow in question and asked, carefully, "On what?"  
  
"Rats mostly," he replied.  
  
A gut-wrenching sick feeling flipped in Buffy's stomach. This was not the conversation she wanted to be having with Spike. She never *thought* she'd be having this conversation with Spike, not in a million years. "It's not enough," she said to him quietly. "Come on, we're going inside."  
  
"No, Buffy. I can't. I don't want them to see me..." he told her, his eyes reflecting a hint of fear. "The can't see me... They won't forgive me."  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Connor was watching Dawn intently. He was so interested in her story of his father. So far, she told him about when Buffy first met him, how she didn't know he was a vampire, let alone a vampire with a soul. Then she told him about their "great love story" which she said with a ton of sarcasm. Angel then turned back into Angelus and almost killed everyone by bringing an apocalypse, but Buffy put a stop to that by sending him into hell. Dawn didn't neglect to add that Spike had a part in the whole thing too, but in keeping the apocalypse from coming. Then a couple of months after, Angel came back, and they started their whole relationship again, but then Angel just got up and left after Buffy and the gang graduated.  
  
"I heard that Angel came to see Buffy when she was in college, back when she was with Riley," Dawn added. "He and Riley had a little fist action. I wish I had seen it."  
  
Connor was still stuck on how his father turned evil. "How did he turn evil?" he asked.  
  
"Um... Buffy and Angel... They kind of... Well, they slept together."  
  
"So that turned him evil..."  
  
"No! I mean, yes. I mean, there's this clause that says that if Angel knows one moment of true happiness, he'll lose his soul and go all bad Angelus again," Dawn explained. "I guess that was his one true moment of happiness."  
  
Connor nodded, not completely understanding. "Well what about Darla, my mother?"  
  
That was beyond Dawn. "Hey, don't look at me. I don't know how *that* happened and how he didn't go bad. But look at it this way, if it *didn't* happen, you wouldn't be here, with all of us, enjoying some R&R at Sunnydale's nightspot." She smiled, in an attempt to ease Connor.  
  
"Hey, where'd your sister go?" he asked, pointing to the empty seat at the bar.  
  
Dawn looked to where he was pointing. Buffy was no longer at the bar. Then Angel caught her attention. He was bolting to the exit. Apparently, something had to be wrong. Why would Angel be making a mad dash for the door?  
  
"I am probably risking an earful from my sister, but... Are you feeling like following them?" Dawn suggested carefully.  
  
Connor was ahead of her. He was already standing up, ready to follow.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
"Forgiveness or not. You need help, Spike. You're coming with me... *now*," Buffy said to Spike sternly.  
  
"If you could only understand what I'm feeling right now," he said to her. "Just to have your eyes on me is painful. I can't... I can never..."  
  
"Buffy?" they both heard someone call.  
  
"It's Angel," Buffy whispered to Spike as the footsteps were coming closer. "Don't make me ask you again. Come with me, into The Bronze."  
  
Spike gave her the crazed giggle that he was so used to doing now. "It doesn't matter. Let him see me. There's no need to hide me from him, Buffy," he said.  
  
Buffy just looked at Spike. He was still leaning on her, trying to keep himself up. He was looking straight into her eyes. There was a sense of pleading in that stare, like he really wanted to say "help me" but couldn't.  
  
That was when Angel rounded the corner. "Buff-?" he started, but didn't finish. His eyes were focused on the vampire leaning on her. "Spike," he said, his face turning stone-cold.  
  
"Angel, there's an explanation for this," Buffy said quickly, still holding on to Spike.  
  
"Yeah, that's what I've been waiting for," Angel replied.  
  
"You've got a bit of explaining to do yourself, mate," Spike said quietly, his comment directed towards Angel.  
  
Buffy looked at Spike, confused, then to Angel. "What's he talking about?"  
  
"Are you telling me you haven't figured it out, pet?" Spike asked, looking at Buffy. He was quite adamant in his question. The confused look on Buffy's face definitely meant she had no clue. "Peaches here was the one spying on us the other night. I knew I felt a familiar presence, I just didn't know it was him."  
  
She looked at Angel, a "how could you spy on me like that" question in her eyes. Buffy's expression conveyed so much more. She was angry that Angel was butting into her business like that. She couldn't believe he would do such a thing- spying on her like he didn't trust her.  
  
"I didn't know where you were going... You just left the house without telling anyone where you were going. I had to follow you out, I was worried," Angel explained. "Then I saw that you were going to the high school. I didn't know why, but I was worried, and if anything were to happen, I'd have been there to protect you."  
  
Spike let out another laugh. "Look at you, still playing the role of the grand savior. You've been gone for so long you can't even imagine what has happened here in good ol' Sunnyhell," he said to Angel.  
  
Buffy mind was somewhere else. If Angel saw them talking... "You know," she said quietly to Angel. "You know, about Spike."  
  
"Believe me, it wasn't the way I hoped to find out," Angel said. Then he looked over to Spike and said, "If I would have even found out at all. That's why Anya was saying the things she did. I'm not the only one anymore." He looked to Buffy again.  
  
"Isn't it ironic?" Spike said, chuckling all the while. "I hated you because you got your soul back, while everyone else loved you, accepted you. Now I get mine, and everyone..." his voice got sad just then, "Everyone hates me."  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Dawn and Connor lurked in the shadows outside of The Bronze. They saw the scene between Buffy, Spike, and Angel from around the corner. It shook them both. They heard every word they were saying.  
  
"... I hated you because you got your soul back, while everyone else loved you, accepted you. Now I get mine, and everyone... Everyone hates me," they heard Spike say to Angel.  
  
Dawn was taken aback by this. She didn't know what to think. He left because he went to get his soul back. Was it for Buffy? Did he love her that much to risk, apparently, his sanity? She knew he loved Buffy, but she also knew that he hurt her, or tried to hurt her. So the real question was, did he get his soul back to get the monster out of him?  
  
"I can't believe she didn't tell me," Dawn whispered softly, inaudible to the others. Then louder she said, stepping into view, "I can't believe you didn't tell me, Buffy. You didn't tell me, Xander, or Willow. Why? You knew he had his soul back. Why didn't you tell us?"  
  
Buffy, Spike, and Angel turned to look at Dawn.  
  
"Dawn," Buffy said, acknowledging her presence.  
  
"Niblet..." Spike said hoarsely.  
  
"Why?" Dawn asked softly, her attention on Spike, who was still leaning on Buffy.  
  
"Dawn, we shouldn't be talking about this now. What we *should* be doing is getting Spike somewhere," Buffy said, starting to lead Spike away.  
  
Connor stepped up behind Dawn just then.  
  
"What are you doing here Connor?" Angel asked.  
  
"I saw you run out. I thought something... bad might be going on," he replied.  
  
Suddenly, Spike spoke up. "I heard about you... You, Connor. You're Angel and Darla's little offspring. Heard about it, all of it- how you locked your dear old daddy in a wooden coffin and sent him into the ocean. Yeah, word gets around you know," his gaze drifted to Angel, "Heard about your little spell of insanity too. And oh, that ex-watcher you used to have tagging along with you, heard about his little alliance with that bloody law firm. Hell, who am I kidding, he's getting his kicks from shagging that woman."  
  
Buffy and Dawn were utterly confused. Angel and Connor looked embarrassed.  
  
"This is like a bleedin' family reunion," Spike muttered to Buffy, who just sighed in response.  
  
"Enough. Spike, I'm taking you to my house. Angel, you're coming with us. Dawn, Connor- you're going to tell the rest of them exactly what's going on. And can you please tell them not to worry. We've got some issues to sort out- *between the three of us*," Buffy said, taking charge. "I will discuss this with everyone later. We'll be at the house, so please, make it clear to Xander that *everything is fine*."  
  
Dawn knew that her sister was just about fed up with everything, and that she wanted to face up to things. Dawn nodded and said, "Alright. We'll meet you at the house later." Then to Connor she said, "Let's go explain." She took Connor by the arm and started walking back into The Bronze.  
  
Buffy started walking with Spike still leaning on her. Angel followed close behind, and the three of them walked back to Buffy's house in silence.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Okay, so it wasn't all *that* Spuffy, but there was a lot of Buffy/Spike interaction. Next chapter will be up shortly. Until then, please R&R! =) 


End file.
